


For What It's Worth

by KanoBelx



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Childhood Friends, Coming Out, Denial of Feelings, Family Drama, Gen, M/M, Moving homes, POV First Person, Self-Discovery, Sibling!AU, akaken, bokuroo - Freeform, childhood crush, disown, rarepair
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-19
Updated: 2017-03-09
Packaged: 2018-09-18 15:15:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 26,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9390548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KanoBelx/pseuds/KanoBelx
Summary: Set in an AU where Akaashi and Kuroo are siblings. Akaashi finds himself back at his old childhood home where his inner turmoils takes the form of family problems and his old, lifelong crush. Too scared to trust even himself, Akaashi struggles to find his place





	1. Homecoming

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place in an AU where Akaashi and Kuroo are brothers. Everything else you need to know will eventually be revealed in the story in due time. Its in Akaashi's first person point of view. I took a lot of creative liberty for each character's personality and individual turmoils, so bear with me. I'll be updating every Monday and occasionally Thursday. I currently don't have a beta, so if there's mistakes feel free to point them out.

I sat in the passenger seat of the car, watching as buildings passed by in a blur. At some point, a sigh escaped my lips for I noticed my mother's glance from the corner of my eye. "Is Onii-san home?" I asked breaking the silence before my mother could ask me what was wrong.

"No, he has club activates today. You were supposed to too, right?" she questioned in return. "Hopefully, you won't get into any trouble for not being there," she mused.

"I'll be fine; I already told them that it would be impossible for me to make it today," I replied casually. Mother laughed heartedly.

"It must be nice being the vice-captain, huh? You get much more leeway," she teased, playfully reaching over to smack my shoulder.

"Yea," I whispered absent mindedly. Her worrisome expression reflected in the mirror and I ignored it. Although her concern was warranted, I didn't want her sympathy. As we continued to drive in silence, I stared at the passing scenery. Pink petals loitered the ground, the vast and tangled branches naked and vulnerable. As the car came up to the driveway, nostalgia washed over me. A soft smile found its way to my lips at the familiarity of my childhood.

"Welcome home, Keiji," Mother smiled placing a kiss on the side of my temple. I exited the car and went around to the back to grab my belongings. When we approached the front door, it suddenly swung open and a dark figured pounced at me.

"Keiji!" Testurou-nii shouted enthusiastically.

"Onii-san," I scoffed placing my things down to hug him back. "It's good to see you again," I chuckled amusingly.

"Oi, no need to be so formal! I'm your big brother after all," he teased letting go of me. "I'm just glad to have you back," he grinned.

"Thanks—"

"Don't just stand there, Tetsu! Help bring his stuff in!" Mother barked.

"Fine!" he shouted back. As he approached the car, he patted me on the shoulder twice. When I entered the house I placed everything down in the entrance hall and looked around. Everything felt so familiar, yet so many things had changed. I wandered into the living area and immediately noticed how much smaller the dining table was compared to the first one we owned.

The living room was rearranged completely different from how I remembered it. Videogame consoles were scattered in front of the TV, the wires and controls tangled into one accumulated mess. On the walls hung dozens of photos of Tetsu-nii and Mother. As I continued to look, I noticed several childhood photos of me hanged as well. Smiling to myself, I grabbed one of the photos. It was taken during winter underneath the kotatsu. Kenma had been cold and curled underneath the table. I followed after him and Tetsu-nii did as well. Kenma's mother thought it was adorable and took photos of us curled up and asleep under the heated table.

As Tetsu-nii and Mother brought in the remainders of my stuff, I returned to the entranced and moved all my thing to my old room. The room was a soft cream white and smelled of fresh laundry. The bed was well made and located in the opposite corner from the doorway. Beside it was a small drawer, used as a makeshift nightstand. Directly across the bed was a desk along the same wall as the door. The drawer was against the wall adjacent to the where I was still standing. Everything was exactly as I remembered, yet so much more vacant. With a soft sigh, I began unpacking, placing everything back to where they belonged. Partial way through it, Tetsu-nii entered my room and collapsed onto my bed.

"Onii-san, I thought you had club activates?" I hummed walking around.

"Stop with the Onii-san. Just because we haven't been living together as brothers, doesn't mean you need to be so formal," he mused. Softly, I shook my head, although I couldn't help but smile at his remark.

"Alright then, _Tetsu-nii_ ," I emphasized. "Why aren't you at volleyball practice?" I asked again.

"I wanted to greet you back home," he relied bluntly. "It's not like they need me; Nobuyuki and Yakkun has it all covered," he added.

"How kind of you," I scoffed.

"Oh, please," he muttered sitting up. "I'm always this kind," he grinned cheekily. I smiled back at him and turned away to finish organizing. After rearranging the majority of my stuff, I went to take a bath; Tetsu-nii going into the kitchen to help our mother cook. Washing off efficiently, I submerged myself into the hot water. With a heavy sigh, I looked down at my shaking hands. _How unfitting_ , I thought. _For a setter's hand to be uneasy._ Covering my eyes with my trembling hands, I leaned backed and took a deep breath. _It's not like my life would change_ , I tried to convinced myself, _I was just in another house—my childhood house—no big deal._ As I repeatedly tried to calm myself down, sudden screaming brought me back to Earth. Quickly I hurried out of the bath and clothed myself.

"What's all the noise—?" I froze as my eyes met with blond.

"Keiji, save me!" Tetsu-nii hollered, half-jokingly, half-seriously as he ducked behind me.

"Kenma?" I whispered in astonishment, my heart suddenly racing. The blond turned to me in surprise, immediately dropping the cushion in his hand.

"Keiji?" he gasped, eyes fixating on me as if in disbelief.

"You dyed your hair," I noted, trying to figure out how to say hi to my old childhood friend. Swiftly he pulled up his hood and on the drawstring, covering up his hair and face entirely. I blushed, unsure if I had said something offensive or uncalled for. My brother snorted from behind me and I nudged him harshly. "Are you okay?" I asked unsure of what else to say. Kenma nodded. "Are you sure?" I insisted. Slowly, he removed the hood.

"I'm fine," he muttered. "So, what are you doing here?" he asked curiously. Reluctantly, I contemplated on how much was actually worth explaining.

"Keiji-boy is living with us again," Testu-nii replied for me as I hesitated.

"Was this your big surprise?" Kenma sighed looking passed me. Confused, I turned around to the taller male who scratched the back of his head and smirked.

"Pretty much," he chimed. "And sorry for leaving you behind with Yaku, I wanted to help Keiji settle in before you got here," he added. Without turning to my childhood friend, I could tell he was glaring daggers.

"Well," he finally voiced, causing me to turn to him. "It's good to see you again," he smiled softly.

"You too," I smiled back.

"Why so polite?" Testu-nii whooped. "Come on Kenma, why not give him a hug?" he suggested. I elbowed my brother and turned back to Kenma.

"It's not necessary," I stated. The blond nodded his head as he picked up the scattered cushions and plopped himself down onto the couch, hugging one of the pillows against his chest.

"How long are you staying?" he asked as I took a seat beside him, keeping a sizable space between us.

"Permanently, or at least until I move out on my own accord," I replied. Once again he nodded in response. The two of us sat in awkward silence, Tetsu-nii watching from several feet away. Suddenly, Mother's voice rang as she called us for dinner.

"You too, Kenma! Why don't you go and see if your parents would like to come over?" she hollered. Kenma got to his feet and left the house as Tetsu-nii and I arranged the table. A few moments passed and Kenma returned with his mother—his father still at work.

"Keiji! How are you doing?" she mused giving me a welcoming hug. "Oh my! Just look at you! You grew up to be so handsome," she teased.

"Oh please," Mother laughed. "He ain't handsome; he's just a pretty boy," she snickered.

"Don't be like that! He's a man!" she smiled, obviously having funny joking with my mother.

"A beautiful one," she sang. The two women laughed as we all took our seat; Kenma across from me.

"So Keiji, how's school?" Kenma's mother asked.

"Fine, thank you, ma'am," I replied softly.

"No need to be so formal," she chuckled. "I helped raise you too, you know? Just call me Auntie like you use to," she smiled brightly. I smiled back at her.

"Thank you, Auntie," she squealed in delight and patted Kenma on the back.

"You boys are all grown up now," she sighed looking all around the table at the three of us.

"Tell me about it. This one here is going to be in university in less than a year," Mother mused nudging over to Tetsu-nii. As they continued to chat away— Tetsu-nii occasionally chiming in to defend himself—I listened in contentment. Meals with my father were always silent. Neither of us spoke a word to one another; we hardly looked at each other. Yet those meals of absolute silence, were still during the good times. As of the past few weeks, meals were accompanied by a constant stream of lectures and harassment.

"You don't know what the hell you're talking about." "You're only eighteen." You don't know what you want from life yet." "You're disgusting." "You got this from your mother, didn't you? I always knew I was too good for her." "You'll never make it far in life like this." "Don't you want to be happy?" "I gave you everything and this is how you repay me?"

"Keiji?" I looked up at the sound of my name, although it was barely a whisper compared to the commotion beside me. "I'm glad you're here again," Kenma smiled that small genuine, feline-like smile of his. Taken by surprise, I blushed a bit and nodded back to him.

"I'm happy to be here too," I smirked.


	2. Moving Forward

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place in an AU where Akaashi and Kuroo are brothers. Everything else you need to know will eventually be revealed in the story in due time. Its in Akaashi's first person point of view. I took a lot of creative liberty for each character's personality and individual turmoils, so bear with me. I'll be updating every Monday and occasionally Thursday. I currently don't have a beta, so if there's mistakes feel free to point them out.

My eyes opened into a peering squint, the light bright enough to blind me from behind my eyelids. Groaning I sat up and rubbed my eyes. With a yawn, I dragged my feet to the bathroom to brush my teeth. Finishing up I splashed my face with water and headed into the kitchen. Mother was sitting on the couch playing one of the many videogames, a cup of coffee on the table in front of her. "Morning, hon," she smiled turning to me.

"Morning," I grumbled back.

"There's some coffee in the kitchen if you want any. If you're anything like me or your brother, I know you'll need it to wake up," she teased. Smiling softly, I headed to the kitchen, pouring myself some coffee and cream before taking a seat beside her.

"Since when did you and Testu-nii become such gamers?" I asked taking a sip of the bittersweet drink.

"Oh please," she chuckled. "All of these are Kenma's. He's here so often that he just leaves some of them here," she explained. A soft curse escaped her lips as the character she was controlling flew off the screen, another bundle of pixels swooping at her with a weapon of sorts. "Wanna try?" she offered handing me the controller. I shook my head.

"I like watching you," I replied softly taking another generous sip. Mother laughed and took a sip of her own drink before resuming her game.

"Any plans for today?" she questioned nonchalantly, although I could tell she was genuinely interested.

"Just volleyball practice in the afternoon," I hummed. She chuckled and nodded her head enthusiastically.

"I'm glad you two took to volleyball so well," she grinned. _It was because of you_. "Hey, why don't you go wake up your brother? He has practice later today too," she suggested. I downed the rest of my cup and headed over to my brother's room. From the other side of the door, I could hear his alarm going off. Opening it, I immediately saw why he didn't hear it. Yanking one of the pillows crushed to the side of his head away, he instantly jolted awake.

"Keiji?" he mumbled with tired eyes.

"Mother wants you up," I informed. Rolling onto his side, he groaned loudly.

"I don't want too," he whined.

"Really, Nii-chan?" I sighed starting to pull the covers away from him. With a little more persistence, he finally got out of his bed. When I returned to the living room, Mother had moved onto another game. She gave me a knowing smiled and patted the empty seat beside her.

"After practice, maybe I can take you two out," she chirped.

"Are you sure you'll be okay playing for my school's tuition?" I blurted out bluntly. My mother paused the game and turned to me with a smile.

"What? Worried about little old me?" she smirked. "Please Keiji, you're my son. Even if I didn't have the money to pay for it, I'd find a way. I'm not going to make this any harder on you than it has to be. You already moved homes, you don't need to move schools too. And I know you worked hard to get in there; I'm not going to let that all go to waste for naught," she comforted kissing my forehead. "I just want you to be happy, don't worry about all the details behind the stage," she reassured.

"Thank you," I mumbled softly.

"Of course, what are mothers for?" she smiled ruffling my hair and getting up. "I'll go make a snack for you and your brother for your practice. Go eat some breakfast," she advised walking into the kitchen. As I got up to follow her, Tetsu-nii entered from the hallway and nudged me lovingly. The two of us greeted one another, eating the leftovers from last night's dinner. I returned to my room to change and pack my gym bag. As the two of us left the house, our mother handed us three paper sacks—one of them for Kenma.

"So, what's it like being back here?" my brother mused as we walked next door to get Kenma.

"Odd, but pleasant," I replied. The blond exited his house sluggishly, a piece of toast stuffed a quarter way into his mouth.

"Mmmmm," he muttered in greeting.

"Good morning to you too, Kozume," I grinned softly. Biting off the piece that was in his mouth, Kenma swallowed.

"Just Kenma is fine," he stated looking down at the ground. Smiling, I nodded my head.

"Alright then, Kenma," I hummed. He smiled delicately and we headed down the block to the train station. As we walked, Tetsu-nii did most of the talking, Kenma playing on his handheld game console and I having nothing interesting to say. At some point, he began pestering the younger boy about his opinion on something.

"Leaving me alone, Kuro. I'm playing my games," he mumbled impatiently.

"Videogames are all nice and fun Kenma, but have you ever thought about how pretty Keiji's eyes are?" he mused casually. Kenma looked up from his game and stared at Tetsu-nii with a vexed expression.

"Nii-chan!" I barked. "Just ignore him—" I paused as my eyes met with gold.

"They are nice," he replied turning back to his game. "Sometimes they look blue, other times they look green… it's nice," he muttered softly. I glared at my brother who merely shrugged and grinned. The rest of the way to the station and the ride itself was peaceful, Tetsu-nii once again filling the silence with random content.

"This is our stop," he stated getting up, Kenma following after instinctively.

"See you at home," I replied, giving them a bow with my head. Tetsu-nii lifted his hand in response and the two exited the train. Dramatically, I sighed and looked at the time. I had forgotten to account for the extra time it would take me to reach Fukurodani, considering I had moved. I dialed up Shirofuku and sighed again.

" _Yo, Akaashi. You okay?"_

"I'm fine, thank you. I'll be arriving late though. I'll explain there," I replied.

 _"_ _Okay, I'll give everyone the heads up,"_ and with that she hung up. Placing my phone back into my pocket, I looked around the car. A young couple about my age sat across from me. The man had his arm wrapped around the girl's shoulder and they were cuddling, happily chatting away. Several seats down from them was a boy sitting in between who I assumed were his parents, talking about some children's cartoon. His parents held either of his hands, listening closely to every blissfully naïve word he had to speak. A young girl sat by herself at the end of the car, staring intently at the phone trapped in her clutches. As time went on, I continued to observe the passengers as they boarded and left for their own lives. And it made me marvel at the thought that as I lived out my own life, simultaneously, everyone else was living their own.

I got off the train and hurried to the club activities room, where I changed into my usual volleyball attire and headed to the gym. When I arrived at the building, I could already hear the sounds of sneakers squeaking and balls colliding into every surface of the structure. Konoha was the first to notice me, waving and grinning as I approached. "Akaashi's here!" he shouted. The sound of my name felt odd to hear and a part of me felt sick for thinking like that.

"What took you so long? Playing hooky again?" Shirofuku teased as everyone stopped what they were doing to huddle around me.

"I was moving yesterday, that's why I couldn't make it to practice. I'm late today because I left at my usual time, but forgot that I now live father away," I explained.

"As long as you're here now," our coach replied. For the next two hours we did our usual regime and routine, then we took our break.

"Akaashi!" Bokuto garbled plopping down beside me. "Practice isn't fun unless you're here! I couldn't do any awesome spikes," he complained.

"My apologies," I hummed as I pulled the food out of the paper bag given to me this morning. I smiled softly at the sight of onigiri and began eating as Bokuto went on about how practice went yesterday. Eventually, the rest of the first string as well as the managers sat beside us.

"Akaashi, you gotta stop eating those convenient store food. It ain't good for you," Komi lectured. As I swallowed the food in my mouth I looked down at the other onigiri in my hand.

"These aren't store bought," I replied coming to the realization that I hadn't had anything homemade in a long time.

"Where'd you get them then?" the libero questioned eating from his own bento.

"My mother made them," I murmured devouring another one.

"You're mom?" Onaga echoed. "You hardly ever talk about her. Actually, I'm pretty sure this is the first time you've ever mentioned her," he noted. I nodded continuing to eat. It was true. I hardly ever spoked about my mother; it's not like I saw her enough throughout my years to have anything interesting to say. When I looked up from my food, Konoha's eyes met with mines, and something told me he knew what I was thinking.

"Akaashi, are you listening to me?" Bokuto whined suddenly; he had supposedly been talking this entire time.

"Sorry Bokuto, you just sound like white noise to me," I replied bluntly. Bokuto complained, but the team easily cheered him up, giving our captain our full undivided attention. Another two hours had passed and practice came to an end.

"You guys want to go karaoke or at least grab a bite somewhere?" Sarukui asked.

"I'm up for either; Yukie and Suzumeda would probably tag along to," Konoha reasoned. Several other members agreed, but I declined the invitation.

"I made plans, maybe next time," I stated gathering my things.

"Ah, wait! Akaashi! Give me your new address before you go!" Bokuto chirped pulling out his phone.

"Why?" I frowned.

"So, I can come over!" he shouted back. Suddenly everyone chimed in in agreement. Sighing, I gave them my address.

"You weren't kidding when you said it was far," Komi snickered. "Why the hell did you move out there?" he asked.

"It's the only place I had left to go," I answered honestly, although confusing my senior more than anything.

"Hey! Isn't Nekoma in that area?" Bokuto grinned delightedly. Suddenly, Shirofuku barged into the room.

"You guys done yet? I'm getting hungry," she mused, Suzumeda behind her trying to pull her away. Guys who were still changing, shrieked in horror as our manager stood unfazed in the doorway. Smiling softly, I bid farewell to my teammates and headed to the only place I had left to go. While on the train ride back, I got a message from Konoha:

_"_ _I know it's none of my business, but if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm all ears. Bokuto—although not the brightest—would always be willing to hear you out too. You're Bokuto's caretaker, our vice-captain, our setter, and our backbone, but you're also our friend. We don't like you because we have to."_

_"_ _Thank you."_ I wasn't sure what else to say. I was overwhelmed and overly flattered by his offer, but there was nothing to talk about. By the time I reached home, it was early evening.

"Welcome home," Mother called. She was sitting on the couch reading with the TV running in the background as filler noise. "Tetsu is out buying groceries with Kenma; they'll be back soon enough. The bath is ready for you, if you want to take it though," she informed. I thanked her and went to go clean myself off. As I soaked in the water, I decided to reflect on Konoha's word. Given by the way he looked at me, I was sure he pieced together the basis of my current situation. Shirofuku probably has a hunch as well.

Exhaling, I brought my knees up to my chest. Although this was the house I had grew up in and although it wasn't new to me, I still felt like I was in a foreign environment. The harder I thought about it, the more I realized that it wasn't because of my new—yet simultaneously old—setting, but the entire atmosphere about it; home cook meals, quality family time, a sibling who was around. All of it was being reintroduced to me, like waking up from an everlasting dream into the life I had before.

My father wasn't a bad man; I never thought he was—I still don't think he is. Misguided maybe, yet he is entitled to his own beliefs. Even if those beliefs were the very thing that destroyed our relationship, as well as the one he had with my mother. Back at home—at my old home, were things are still so vividly familiar—I had been alone. I'm not ashamed to tell my team anything, yet I don't want to burden them, nor do I want them to treat me differently.

Sighing, I left the bath and dressed myself into something casual. With a towel on my head I walked into the living room, Kenma playing videogames with Tetsu-nii on the other side reading a book of his own; Mother was nowhere in sight. Tetsu-nii noticed me and motioned me over. As I took a seat in between them, Kenma turned to me, giving me a bow of his head in acknowledgement. I bowed my head back in returned and watched him play as I dried my hair. An hour passed and Mother appeared from her room, dressed up for the public. Kenma declined her offer of dinner and returned to his own house. Tetsu-nii and I changed into more suitable clothing and the three of us head out for dinner.


	3. A Day in the Life of

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll be updating every Monday and occasionally Thursday. I currently don't have a beta, so if there's mistakes feel free to point them out.

The following morning I woke up around noon and, after finishing up my usual morning routine, took a seat at my old desk and began doing my homework. An hour or so pass when somebody knocked on my door. "Come in," I called not turning away from my work.

"Yo, Keiji," Tetsu-nii smiled closing the door after him and taking a seat on my bed behind me.

"Need anything?" I asked still not looking at him.

"No, just wanted to spend some quality time with my brother," he replied with a taunting tone. Smiling softly to myself, I nodded my head and turned around in my chair to face him. Tetsu-nii grinned widely at this and nodded his head approvingly. "So how was living with dad?" he questioned. Instinctively I scoffed and nodded my head.

"It was fine; lonely, but honestly fine. We had our moments where we were got along and moments where we argued. But in the end, he really did want me to be happy. I mean we had to have been close, otherwise I wouldn't have told him what I did," I sighed staring down at my hands.

"Say it,"

"What?" I looked up at my brother and with a very serious expression he repeated himself.

"Say it. Say it out loud; what was it that you told him?" he inquired. I glared at him.

"Don't be distasteful, you already know what it was that I said," I snapped, surprised by the bitterness in my voice.

"You told me that night when we were on the phone, why can't you tell me again?" I didn't reply and Testu-nii sighed walking over and kneeling down in front of me. "Keiji, I don't want you to resent this part of yourself because Dad couldn't accept you. You're fine just the way you are, you don't need to worry," he reassured grabbing my hand in his. I took a deep breath and sighed.

"I'm gay," I murmured. Tetsu-nii grinned and stood up patting my back.

"Good," he mused reclaiming his seat on my bed. "But you know, it took you sixteen years to tell him, what was the hold up?" he questioned.

"What are you talking about?" I frowned, genuinely confused.

"Oh please!" he cried out with laughter—it was a phrase he got from Mother, I could tell. "You've had a crush on Kenma since day one!" Instinctively I grabbed my eraser and hurled it at him. Using my pillow as a shield, Tetsu-nii chucked the eraser right back at me. I caught it and sighed. "So, tell me," he hummed sitting up nicely, the pillow still in his lap. "Do you still like—?"

"Don't say it!" I snapped pointing my pencil at him menacingly. Tetsu-nii smiled and nodded his head, putting his hands up as if he had gotten caught for a crime.

"You know I always brought you up in conversations," he stated.

"Please tell me it was nothing like your attempt at it yesterday," I groaned in distrust, remember his terrible attempt to bring up my eyes.

"Well…" he hummed. Even with me glaring at him, he merely laughed it off. "When you first moved away, Kenma was devastated. He cried so much, and he refused to go to school because you wouldn't be there. When I left to go to middle school he brought you up on his own accord. Saying that he wished you were still here so that at least he would have one friend with him at school," he smirked.

"Stop getting my hopes up. Whatever I felt about him and whatever he felt about me—if he ever did—is in the past now. We're in high school. We hadn't seen each other in years—"

"That's because you avoided us every time our schools met for a practice match and during tournaments," he pointed out obvious annoyed.

"I was busy tending to Bokuto," I shrugged.

"If you weren't my brother, I would believe you. That Bokuto can be a handful," Tetsu-nii snorted. I chuckled and nodded my head.

"You're acquainted?" I mused.

"I mean we're both captains now. We've played each other a few times, we're the same ages. He's a fun guy, albeit a handful," he laughed heartedly. "But hey, you do realize you said to not your hopes up, right?" he smirked.

"What? No I didn't, when?" I fussed.

"Earlier when I was talking about Kenma," he teased. I scoffed and shook my head.

"Get out of my room. I have homework I need to finish for class tomorrow," I stated turning around back to my desk. Tetsu-nii laughed as he ruffled my hair before walking towards the door.

"I'm pretty sure he's into you, pretty boy," he snickered. I waved a hand at him and he left. With a sigh, I pulled out the photo of the three of us when we were kids that I kept inside my wallet. I smiled and placed it down. It was just a fairytale crush, nothing serious. I continued doing my homework for almost an hour and although the questions were being answered, I retained none of it. Frowning I picked up the volleyball underneath my desk and laid on my bed, beginning to set the ball into the air.

Back when I was a kid, while I was still young and naïve, I had a crush on Kenma. At the time it meant nothing to me, except that I loved being around him; that I constantly wanted him beside me. It wasn't meant to mean anything. At the time, I hadn't realize that it made me anything to like someone of the same sex. But I guess that's why there's bliss in ignorance. Tetsu-nii seemed to notice it immediately; he was my brother after all.

But being back here, seeing him again; things were bound to be different. We grew up together, but then we grew apart and on our own. If anything he would have a crush on Tetsu-nii, not me. That's if he even liked guys. I let out a frustrated groan, the ball slipping in between my hands smacking me right in the face. I groaned again, sitting up and rubbing my nose. Suddenly my phone went off. Scrambling across the room to my desk I picked it up.

"Hello?" I sighed.

_"_ _Distressed?"_ Konoha's voice sounded.

_"_ _Is he sick? Should we stopped by?"_ Bokuto shouted from a distant.

_"_ _Down boy, down,"_ Komi laughed.

_"_ _We're having a team outing with the managers. We were in the mood for some ramen, you in?"_ Konoha explained.

"I'll ask,"

_"_ _Since when do you need permission?"_ he chuckled.

"Since I started living with my mom," I replied leaving my room and going down the hall. "Mother?" I called.

"In my room, hon," she chimed. When I walked in she was in front of a bunch of paperwork. "What's up, sweetheart?" she smiled turning to me.

"My friends were wondering if I could go out," I explained gesturing to my phone.

"Of course! Just don't stay out too late; you still have school tomorrow," she mused waving me away. "And be safe on your ride back home! I don't like the trains once it gets dark!" she yelled as I left her room.

"I can go," I replied lifting the phone back to my ear.

_"_ _I heard,"_ Konoha teased. _"Your mom sounds nice,"_ he added.

"She is. Just send me the address; I'll see you in twenty," I stated hanging up and getting dressed. When I walked into the main part of the house, Kenma was sitting at the dining room table asleep on top of his textbooks. "Kenma," I coaxed, lightly shaking my childhood friend. He mumbled softly as he yawn and sat up.

"Keiji, you're back," he murmured rubbing his eyes.

"Back? What do you mean? I've been in my room this whole time?" I questioned.

"You came back just like how you promised. You were gone for so long," he yawned again attempting to put his head back down. With a sigh I pulled him up to his feet and took him to my room. Placing him into my bed, I left him to sleep. As I walked pass the dining table again, I took a peek at his work. Quickly I scribbled down a note and placed it on top of his books and left.

_"_ _Where are you?"_ I texted my brother as I walked down to the station.

_"_ _Picking up an apple pie to motivate Kenma to do his work"_ he replied. _"Oh yea, he's in our living room"_

_"_ _Caught on thanks. He was asleep, so I took him to my room to nap"_

_"_ _Getting him into your bedroom already? My, Keiji, you've changed!"_

_"_ _Keep it to yourself. I'm going out with friends right now. I left him a note saying I'll help him study when I get back. Don't be too harsh on him while I'm gone."_

_"_ _Oh please, I'm a delight~"_

_"_ _I'm not the type to destroy children's dreams, so you believe what you want."_

_"_ _Rude!"_ I chuckled as I placed my phone into my pocket. Getting off at my stopped I hurried over to the rendezvous point. The air was crisp and warm, a light breeze playful nudging my clothes and hair. Trees were decorated in different shades of green, all of their colorful petals scattered on the gray monotonous ground. Clouds defiled the blue sky, yet the sun's light peered through.

"Akaashi!" Bokuto shouted happily throwing his arm around my shoulder when I arrived. A small cringed came over me at the sound of my surname, but Bokuto didn't seem to notice, his arm still hanging around me.

"Hello Bokuto," I smiled giving a nod to everyone else.

"Come on, let's eat! Everything's on Bokuto," Sarukui chirped as we walked down the street.

"What? Saru! I don't remember agreeing to this," he whined.

"But Bokuto! You're our captain! Isn't it your job to make your team happy? Aren't we _your_ responsibility?" Komi persisted. Bokuto whined and protested, but his simple-mindedness betrayed him once again, as he agreed. When we arrive, we all bunched into a booth and ordered.

"We missed you yesterday," Shirofuku chimed from the other end.

"My apologies; I had dinner to attend," I replied giving her a polite smile. She smiled back at me and nodded her head.

"So how's your new home?" Bokuto asked eagerly beside me, his arm still draped across my shoulders.

"Pleasant," I hummed.

"It's near Nekoma, right?" he chimed.

"What's with your obsession with Nekoma?" Washio questioned.

"It ain't an obsession!" he barked, finally pulling his arms away. "I just think they have a great team! I mean they're always a part of our summer training camp that's coming up!" he explained cheerfully.

"We still got two months till then," I pointed out.

"Still!" he sang now turning away from Washio to me. "I heard their captain is a real god at blocking! I just can't wait to have somebody like that block against me," he mused.

"Ah, so it's about whose better, hmm? Well ain't that vain, Kou?" the third year manger snickered.

"No! I mean—Kuroo's real cool," he grinned. "I want to go against him as equals. You know, someone who can keep up with me!" As Bokuto continued to ramble about my brother, I came to the realization that I never told any of them that I had a brother or even more so that he was the now high school volleyball famous Kuroo Tetsurou. Suddenly Bokuto shook me.

"Did you say something?" I asked turning to him.

"Akaashi!" he cried everyone else laughing. As we each got our meal, the conversations continued just as enthusiastically as before. I smiled in contentment as I ate. At least I could count on them to always remain the same. After Bokuto reluctantly paid the bill, the nine of us decided to hit the town. We wandered from store to store, zigzagging across the street from one place to another. As we continued around in our aimless journey, Bokuto grabbed my arm, pulling to the back of the group. "Hey Akaashi, are you okay?" he asked.

"I'm fine, why?" I replied giving him a skeptical glance.

"You've just seem distracted and you're never distracted!" he chirped. I chuckled lightly and nodded my head.

"I'm surprise you realized. It's nothing though," I smiled walking toward everyone else. Suddenly Bokuto grabbed my arm, his grip tight and unrelenting.

"I'm your captain, it's my job to make you guys happy; it's my responsibility. So if something bothers you, tell me," he persisted.

"Nothing is wrong, really. I'm just distracted. There's a lot I have to deal with, you know, with me moving and all. But honestly, I'm fine," I reassured patting his arms. "Thank you for worrying about me," I added as he let go of me.

"Alright then… I trust you," he replied following after me. "But you know, you can always trust me!" he exclaimed pointing at himself triumphantly.

"Thank you, Bokuto. Really," I smiled patting his shoulder. "Come on," the two of us caught up to the rest of the group, Konoha throwing his arms around the both of us and grinning widely. At some point, my phone went off and I looked down at the notification.

_"_ _I'll take you up on your offer. Come home whenever you want,"_ Kenma messaged. I smiled.

_"_ _Will do. Don't eat all the pie before I get back,"_ he replied with an annoyed emoji and typed, I'll try. After another hour of shopping, I returned home. While on the ride back, I got several text from Bokuto, wishing me luck and happiness. I scoffed—or maybe it was a chuckle—and thanked him. When I entered my house, I could hear my brother and Kenma talking from the entrance hallway. "I'm home," I called walking into the main room.

"Welcome back," they both chimed. Tetsu-nii was sitting at the dining table and Kenma was on the couch, once again, playing his games.

"After I shower, I'll help you with your homework if you still want me to," I offered turning to Kenma.

"Yes please," he replied pausing his game to look up at me. "We still have some pie too if you want," he added. I nodded, smiling politely. I took a quick shower, deciding to skip my usual soul-searching-self-reflecting bath. After getting out, I went to my room and gathered up my stuff. I glanced at my clock, noting the time; four-thirty. As I walked towards the living room I could hear the two of them talking again. "Of course, I like him! I like him more than you," Kenma's voice snapped. "He doesn't pester me," he added.

"Hey, in my defense, I'm doing it for your sakes. You can hardly take care of yourself; mainly because you don't try," Tetsu-nii gruffed. "Anyways, he's also really attractive, don't you think?" he sighed dreamily.

"He is… unlike you," he replied casually.

"Why is ever compliment you're giving him turn into an insult for me?" he cried. Tetsu-nii was the first to notice me, giving me a cheeky grin as I approached. Glaring at him, I shook my head. They were both sitting at the dining table at this point, Kenma seated in the chair I had found him asleep in previously. "Well, I'm going to my room now. Call me if you need me," he replied getting up. As he passed me, he patted me on the shoulder and I shook my head once more. Placing my things down, I took the seat besides my old childhood friend.

"Thank you for letting me sleep in your bed," he stated while not looking at me.

"Of course, it's nothing really. You just seemed tired, that's all," I replied smiling softly.

"I'm always tired," he sighed. I chuckled and nodded my head.

"Of course. So, what subject should we start on?" I asked. The two of us spent the next couple hours doing our own homework while I helped him study. "Sorry about my brother," I stated as I read about the molecular bonds of organic material. Kenma seemed to have smiled at that and shook his head.

"Kuro is always a handful. Don't blame yourself for his short comings," he smirked. Smiling to myself, I nodded in agreement. "But—I mean—at least he always means well," he added.

"He does, doesn't he?" I hummed rhetorically, recalling our conversation in my bedroom earlier that day.

"So… how're you?" he asked. It was unlike him to try and continue a conversation, but it made me happy that he did so.

"I'm well, thank you. Yourself?" I mused in response.

"The same every day; fine, just tired," he replied.

"You need to take better care of yourself," I smiled looking over at him. Kenma as well looked up at me, before reverting his attention back to the textbook in front of him.

"Insomnia is a pain in the ass," he mumbled. "I stay up into all sorts of hours into the night yet fall asleep whenever the sun is up," he muttered with disdain, yet something like amusement.

"Same actually," I smirked in dissatisfaction. "I usually sleep at four," I sighed.

"You know… if there's ever a reason to, you can text me at night. I sleep really late too. We can keep each other company," he suggested.

"That sounds pleasant, but only on nights where we really need it," I replied. The two of us continued our subtle conversation as we proceeded to work. Eventually, Kenma's mother called him home and he left; taking one more slice of pie with him and leaving me with the last one. I gathered my material and returned to my room, stopping by Tetsu-nii's first.

"Need something—? Ow!" he shouted as I through my eraser at him.

"Stop bring me up in conversations," I glared.

"He brought you up that time," he groaned, rubbing his head where the eraser hit him.

"Did he?" I asked walking in and taking a seat on his bed. He was sitting in the middle of his room, a foldable table blanketed in his work.

"Yea. He was asking where you went and I explained you were out with Fukurodani and what not. Then I asked him if he was glad that you were back—ow!" he yelped as I smacked the back of his head.

"That still counts as you bring up the weird conversations about me," I sighed.

"Oh please!" he complained. "I'm just trying to be you're wingman," he teased, although completely serious.

"I don't need a wingman," I scoffed.

"Come on, try and say it to my face that you no longer have feelings for him—"

"I no longer have feelings for him," I recited staring into his hazel eyes.

"That's unfair, you're so cold and non-emotional," I narrowed my eyes. "Fine, but if you ever want me to help you out again, you know where to find me," he huffed gesturing to his room. Sighing, I got up and left. Once I returned to my own room, I collapsed face first onto my bed. Tetsu-nii wasn't wrong; I was only saying those words without meaning a single thing.

It's not like I had gone my entire life liking Kenma; I had honestly moved on after I had moved away. But my curiosity and own self-realization, made me think about him from time to time. If it weren't for Kenma, would I have discovered my sexuality much later? Would I have even ended up gay? Not that being gay was a choice of mine, yet there were so many "what ifs". And because of them, I couldn't help but wonder "what if I stayed", "what if I hadn't moved", "what if I had confessed", "what if we continued to stay in touch?" There were too many of them and none of them had mattered. But from the moment they invaded my mind, they never left. I thought about him, but not in the I-want-him kind of way, more like it-could-have-been. But "what ifs" don't matter when it comes to reality.

After returning back here and having to see him so often, a new realization came over me. I did, in fact, liked him and it scared me. Just as Tetsu-nii implied, I went all of junior high and high school avoiding them at matches. First of all, I was embarrass of facing the older brother I never kept in contact with and second, seeing my childhood friend and first ever crush who I could hardly speak to now. It was nice of my brother to help me out, but what I needed wasn't a boyfriend, just a friend; and I had plenty to start out with. Kenma didn't know I was gay and I wanted to keep things like that for a little while longer. There was no reason to tell him. "But what's a reason to hide it?" I mumbled to myself.

"Keiji! Dinner!" Mother called. Getting off my bed, I headed down to eat.


	4. Back in Motion

In the darkness of my childhood room, I stared blankly at the ceiling, my alarm blaring consistently. Finally registering the sound, I turned over and slammed the alarmed off. I groaned; waking up half an hour earlier than what I was used to turn out to be a big toll. Getting out of bed, I got ready for school as quietly as I could. As I was making myself some coffee, Tetsu-nii walked down. "Morning," he yawned. "Why're you up so early?" he murmured still half asleep.

"My school is farther than yours," I replied bitterly. Tetsu-nii nodded his head sluggishly and head back upstairs. As I approached the front door, I ran into Mother.

"You're leaving already?" she chirped in concern.

"If I want to make it to school on time, I have to leave early," I sighed.

"Crap! I forgot!" she cursed shaking her head. "I was going to make you lunch. Ah well, I don't want you to be late either," she muttered.

"Its fine," I replied patting her shoulder as I struggled to put my shoes on. "There's always tomorrow and every day from here on out," I smiled.

"You're right, hon," she smiled back, kissing my forehead. "Have fun in school," she added before walking towards the kitchen. I hurried out of my house and boarded the train. I hated mornings. When I arrived at school, I approached it like a zombie, my legs dragging behind me.

"Good morning, Akaashi!" I let out an exaggerated sigh.

"You're too loud, Bokuto," I stated before the third year had actually caught up to me.

"Looks like someone is having a wonderful morning," Konoha laughed as he and Komi approached us, the four of us turning into the school together.

"I hate mornings," I replied before taking a large gulp of my coffee.

"If you keep drinking those like its water, you ain't gonna grow anymore," Komi warned.

"Says you," the wing spiker teased.

"Shut it, Akinori," he growled. The three of them talked as I sighed and listened happily, occasionally putting in my input. Classes went by in a breeze. Although my life was being turned into a mess, I could depend on those lectures to be the same as before; dull, jam-pack, and long. When lunch came around, a small smile found its way to my lips as I recalled the conversation with my mother. It really was the thought that counted, given that my father never bothered to cook for me. I spent lunch with the third years as I always did before.

The end-of-the-day bell rang and I headed down to the volleyball club room. A bunch of us scrambling in and out as we changed into our gym clothes. Practice went about routinely and I felt comforted. Just like with the lectures, things really hadn't seemed all that different. For once, the little things seemed to really matter to me. After practice, the others and I boarded the train, several of us chatting away. One by one, they all got off until I was sitting by myself. When I arrived at home, Mother and Tetsu-nii greeted me warmly.

It was nice to have someone to come home to. Having people waiting—expecting me to be back—was something I wasn't used to. It's not like my father didn't want me around—at least at first, I mean. He just wasn't home to greet me. Albeit different, I really was enjoying my new life.

* * *

 

It had been two weeks since I first moved and things were going fine for me, yet now I laid wide awake in my bed, tossing and turning alone in the darkness. Rolling over to the drawer besides my bed I checked the time; three in the morning. Sighing, I suffocated myself underneath my pillow and groaned softly. Near me, my phone buzzed. Removing my pillow I picked up the device, the light from the screen burning my eyes

_"_ _Are you awake?"_ I read.

_"_ _Yea, you too?"_ I answered. _What do you mean_ you too _? Of course he's awake, he's the one who texted you!_ My mind shouted at myself as I sat up.

_"_ _Yea"_ Kenma replied. Internally, I panicked, unsure of what to say next.

_"_ _Shouldn't you be asleep? We have school tomorrow,"_

_"_ _I could say the same to you,"_

_"_ _Touché,"_

_"_ _Have any techniques to help you sleep?"_

_"_ _Nothing in particular. I usually just wait until I pass out from exhaustion honestly."_

_"_ _Lol that's not very good for you"_

_"_ _Well neither is three hours of sleep,"_

_"_ _True, that's why I nap throughout the day; especially during class (sometimes practice too but don't tell Kuro)"_ I smiled as I laid back down.

_"_ _Wish I could sleep during class, but I'd fall too far behind (and don't worry your secret is safe with me)"_

_"_ _What class are you in?"_

_"_ _6, you?_

_"_ _3, I mean I knew you were smart but NERD"_

_"_ _Says the advent videogamer"_ The two of us texted back and forth until the sun had risen. At some point, I would have fallen asleep, yet I didn't want the conversation to end. While on the train to school I blacked out, a fellow classmate waking me up as we approached our stop. With a yawn, I sauntered towards the gate, catching up to my group of teammates.

"Looks like someone didn't get much sleep," Sarukui teased. I mumbled and sighed, no coherent words leaving my mouth. They all chuckled and went on with their conversation as I listened as usual.

"Seriously, what time did you go to bed?" Komi exclaimed when lunch rolled around.

"I didn't," I muttered, eating my bento.

"Good luck in practice," Konoha snickered.

"You need to take better care of yourself!" Bokuto lectured.

"Never thought that the day would come where Bokuto would lectured me on self-care," I smirked softly.

"Akaashi! I'm serious!" he whined.

"Yes, I know. My apologies," I mused back. As class resumed into session, I struggled to stay awake. Luckily enough for me, even though I understood none of it, I was still able to take decent notes. Practice was much easier to get through; the exercise helping me stay awake. On the ride home, I faded in and out, afraid that if I fell asleep I would skip my stop.

"You look dead," Tetsu-nii commented when I entered the house. "Kenma was really sleep deprive today too. Wonder if it's a coincidence," he teased.

"Drop it, Nii-chan," I muttered going to my room to take a much needed nap. From then on, Kenma and I made rules about how late we could stay up texting one another, yet that didn't stop us most nights. We began texting more days than not, casually replying throughout the day whenever we could. Only at night did we talk consecutively.

* * *

 

About a month in after I had moved, summer began to settle in. The temperature became increasingly warmer and nights became decreasingly shorter. The wind still danced in gentle breezes, but the clouds scarcely covered the skies. During class, I received a text from Mother, telling me to call her once I found the time. When lunch arrived I frantically called her. "Hello? Is everything okay?" I asked worrisomely.

" _Yes, yes, everything's perfectly fine, hon,_ " she sang. " _It's just that, your dad called. We forgot to change your address and the school sent some stuff to his place for you,_ " she explained.

"Oh," I whispered.

" _It's no big deal, just go down to the office and have them change your address. And if it's okay with you, stop by your dad's place to pick up your mail. If that's too much, then have Tetsurou go with you or do it by himself,_ " she advised.

"I'll be alright… I'll probably just bring him with me," I replied shaking my head in disdain at the thought of having to return. "Did… did he sound angry?" I asked hesitantly.

" _Who cares what he sounded like? That bastard is a dumbass,_ " she snapped. It was quite for a moment and I heard her sigh. " _Keiji, whatever your father thinks of you isn't important. You have people who accept you for who you are. And I understand you not wanting to tell anyone outside of me and you brother, but you should really open up to someone else. It might help you with whatever guilt or stress you're feeling,_ " she suggested.

"Thank you, Mother, but you don't need to worry about me," I replied.

" _I know,_ " she sighed. We said our goodbyes and she hung up. With a deep breath I returned to the main hall to where my friends were.

"Akaashi!" Bokuto shouted enthusiastically waving me over to him, Konoha, and Shirofuku. I grimaced; now was a bad time to be reminded about who raised me.

"You're being too loud," I pointed out as I approached them. "Where's everyone else?" I asked looking around, not seeing any of the other third years.

"Actually, we wanted to talk to you in private," Shirofuku replied leading us to an empty classroom.

"We understand that you're going through some stuff," Konoha added in. "And we get that it's personal, we really do, but—"

"We're worried that something may be troubling you," our manager interrupted.

"I know I said that I trust you—and I do! You're our setter after all, but you're the type to keep things to yourself," Bokuto frowned. "And we don't want you to keep things to yourself," I sighed deeply and nodded my head.

"Sorry for troubling you guys—"

"You're not," Konoha reassured. "You're our friend, we care because we want to,"

"It's not like it's troubling your volleyball skills either," Shirofuku mused.

"It's just your face," Bokuto stated bluntly. Konoha nudged him.

"What he means is that it's beginning to show on your face that something is wrong," he sighed.

"I…" I paused, Mother's words echoing in my head. "I got disowned last month," I sighed in defeat of myself. All three of them looked quite surprise, yet none of them spoke, waiting eagerly for me to continue. "My parents divorced when I was young and I ended up moving away with my father. As of a while ago, my father and I no longer saw eye-to-eye and I ended up getting disowned. Afterwards, my mother agreed to take me in," I explained. "That's why I moved to her place so suddenly," I added.

"What… what did you get disowned for?" Konoha asked hesitantly.

"I was gay—I mean, I _am_ gay," I answered honestly.

"You're dad's stupid," Bokuto frowned.

"Kou!" Shirofuku shouted, shoving the ace away.

"I'm serious! If he disowned you for something so little as that, then maybe you're too good for him!" he shouted. "Akaashi is one of the smartest, one of the coolest, and one of the best overall people I know—and I know a lot of people!" he pouted childishly.

"Thank you Bokuto," I smiled.

"So, does your mom know?" Konoha questioned.

"Yea, my mother happens to be bisexual, so she was very supportive," I explained.

"I'm really sorry about all this Akaashi. It really sucks," he frowned placing a reassuring hand on my shoulder.

"It's fine. I've been able to come to terms with all this and especially myself," I replied.

"Good for you," Shirofuku smiled. "You know, if you really need anyone to talk to, you got us. I mean I am a lesbian," she added.

"What?" I muttered in disbelief. She chuckled and nodded.

"I'm really open about it, but I don't go around parading my sexuality," she smirked.

"I'm actually the same," Bokuto piped. "Well I mean, I'm not a lesbian; is it even possible for me to be one?" he muttered beginning to get side track.

"Kou!" she shouted nudging him again.

"Right, sorry!" he yelled shaking his head. "I'm gay too!" he declared.

"I know," I replied casually.

"What? You do? How?" he gasped in disbelief.

"You're quite easy to read. I can tell by the way you look at other people and how you're often disinterested in offers made by females," I explained with a shrugged. Speechless, Bokuto stammered incoherently. Shirofuku laughed openly as she patted our captain on his back trying to comfort him. I turned to Konoha expectantly and he shrugged.

"I'm bi," he admitted nonchalantly. I nodded.

"Anyone else in the team?" I asked.

"Kaori's pan," our manager chirped. "And hey, if you're still feeling down about all this, we can go eat to our hearts' content after practice, how's that sound? It'll be our treat," she offered. Sighing, I shook my head.

"I have to go pick something up… at my father's," I muttered.

"Will you be okay?" she frowned.

"I will. It's not like he can do anything more to hurt me; it'll be alright. I'll take up your offer another day though," I smiled softly. The three third years nodded and patted me on the shoulder and the back. "I'll also be a little late to practice if that's alright," I added.

"Take your time; we'll cover for your ass," the blond replied with a grin.

"Thank you," I smiled back. When the school day ended I went to the office to grab a form to change my address before heading to the club. Nothing seemed to have changed, Bokuto and Konoha acting normal on the court despite my previous fears. After practice, I noticed a new message on my phone.

_"_ _Mom texted me. I'm on the train towards your school. Tell me which stop to get off at,"_ Tetsu-nii wrote. I gave him the old stop I used to get off at and boarded the train, leaving behind my friends. When I arrived, I waited at the station for my brother.

"You okay?" he asked patting my back.

"Just fine," I muttered. As we walked, Tetsu-nii talked about his day, occasionally stopping to ask me about mines. "I finally opened up to some of my friends," I stated plainly.

"How'd that go?" he questioned, seeming somewhat worried.

"Fine; turns out one of them was a lesbian, another was bi, and another was gay—but I already knew the last one," I shrugged. Tetsu-nii laughed and nodded his head.

"It really is true that gay people like to huddle close to one another whether they know it or not," he teased.

"Well, what about you? You're pan, what about your friend?" I questioned.

"Several actually… now I wonder if volleyball just attracts the gays," he mused. I shoved him playfully as he laughed. "Come on, it's true," he teased. I smirked and shook my head. We continued talking until we arrived at my old, vividly familiar home. "Will you be okay?" he frowned.

"I will be; I have you here after all," I murmured taking a deep breath and knocking on the door. Several seconds elapsed before the door swung open, Father standing in the doorway. He clicked his tongue and moved aside, retreated backing into the house without a word. With a sigh, I followed him in, closing the door behind Tetsu-nii. I didn't dare leave the entrance, but when Father stopped and turned around, I hurried after, dragging my brother with me. Everything was so familiar, yet—once again, like my new home—so oddly different.

"So Tetsurou, how have you been?" he asked completely ignoring me. Scoffing, I didn't speak a word.

"Great, considering I wasn't raised by you," Tetsu-nii sassed. Father glared at him as he handed over my mail.

"At least in my house you would've learned some respect," he remarked haughtily.

"I would pick acceptance any day," he hissed back. I placed my hand over my brother's chest and shook my head.

"Let's just leave," I muttered turning around towards the entrance.

"Running away with your tail between your legs again, you faggot?" Father hollered at me.

"Why, you stinken bastard—"

"Drop it, Tetsu-nii," I shouted, my brother turning to me in shock. "I just want to go home," I breathed.

"Fine," he growled in discontent. The ride back home was silent, my eyes nonchalantly staring at my letters. "You deserved better," Tetsu-nii stated as we exited the train, neither of us looking at one another. It was almost as if he hadn't said anything, but he did and it was comforting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Due to having my finals this week, I won't be updating on Thursday.


	5. What the Heart Wants

_"_ _We haven't really caught up with one another,"_ It was one in the morning and I laid on my side texting Kenma.

 _"_ _We see each other almost every day and we text just as often, but you're right we haven't,"_ I replied. I paused before quickly typing another message. _"Maybe we should hang out?"_ Moments had passed and Kenma didn't answer. A pit in my stomach began to stir. _Was I too up front?_ Suddenly, my phone buzz and I shot up.

_"_ _Sounds good to me. Let's go on Sunday since we don't have practice. It'll just be the two of us, otherwise Kuro would do all the talking or intervene when we do."_

_"_ _Sure, I'll meet you at your place at 2?"_

_"_ _Can't wait,"_ My heart began to flutter and I fell back onto my bed. How pathetic of me to be heads over heels for him all over again. I shook my head. _No, this just a hangout between friends. Stop getting ulterior motives; it's not_ _a date._ The two of us texted until it was four, our agreed time to stop, yet I couldn't sleep. _Just two days_ , I repeated in my head. Time moved at an _excruciatingly_ slow paced as I constantly checked the time, hoping that Sunday would arrive sooner.

"You seem excited for something," Suzumeda chirped as she handed me a water bottle during our Saturday practice.

"Do I?" she giggled and nodded her head.

"Your eyes are sparkling and you keep playing with your fingers in anticipation," she pointed out. I looked down at my hands, noticing that my left hand was holding my right fingers. Casually, I pulled my hands apart. "So? What're you so excited for?" she persisted jubilantly.

"Nothing," I replied. "Just spending time with an old friend tomorrow, that's all," I admitted.

"Oh! Sounds fun, good luck with that," she winked. Smiling politely, I nodded my head in acknowledgement. Practice came to an end, Bokuto only getting into a rut twice. When I retreated home, Kenma was laying on our couch, a game console in his hand.

"I'm home," I stated. He peeked from behind his game before shifting his eyes back.

"Welcome home," he chimed blankly.

"What are you doing here?" I asked taking a seat at the end of the couch, besides his feet.

"My parents went out together and I don't like it when the house is empty," he explained.

"Where's Testu-nii?" I hummed looking around.

"Showering," I nodded sitting there in awkward silence. It then came to my realization that Testu-nii was usually our buffer. When conversations fell flat, or were virtually non-existent, he filled the silence for us. My heart began pounding; what if tomorrow was a disaster? What if we had nothing to say tomorrow? What if instead, I said something stupid? "So," he chirped. "Do you have anywhere you want to go specifically?" he asked sitting up, but still focusing on his game. "You know, for tomorrow," he added in uncertainty.

"Not really. We can stop by somewhere for lunch and walk around," I suggested as he nodded his head.

"We can do whatever you want," he murmured.

"Are you sure? What about you? Is there something you'd like to do in specific?" I questioned in turn. Kenma's eyes shifted to me for a second and he shook his head.

"I just want to spend some time with you so—you know—anything's fine," he answered. Suddenly, the weight on my heart lifted.

"Right, that sounds great," I smiled.

"What sounds great?" Tetsu-nii's voice hollered from around the hall.

"Nothing!" we both yelled back, giving each other a small smirk as we did so. Tetsu-nii walked into the room eyeing us suspiciously.

"Alright then," he whistled. "Well, Mom's out with friends, so we're cooking our own dinner," he informed pointing a finger over his shoulder at the kitchen.

"I don't know how to cook," I replied getting up to shower. Tetsu-nii laughed patting my shoulder as I passed him.

"Don't worry, we'll teach you," he grinned.

"We?" I mused looking at Kenma. He turned to me and shrugged.

"I only help with cutting and mixing; I don't actually cook," he explained. Chuckling, I nodded.

"Of course, well I'm gonna go shower first," I smiled walking off towards the bathroom. I stood underneath the steamy water and took a deep breath. This pathetic puppy crush of mines would be the end of me. _Maybe I should confess; see how things work out,_ I thought. Groaning, I shook the idea out of my head. We're hanging out for the _first_ time since I got back as _friends_ , there's no need for me to jeopardize everything. It's not like I even had the courage to do it in the first place. _I'm supposed to be the cool and collected one, so why is it that I'm freaking out now?_ Sighing, I stepped out of the shower and backed into the main living area. "What's on the menu?" I hummed.

"Fried rice," Tetsu-nii replied yanking Kenma off the couch by his feet. Kenma complained as he allowed Tetsu-nii to drag him to the kitchen. I chuckled helping my childhood friend up. "Alright, Keiji, you make the rice," my brother directed as he scavenge through the fridge.

"I… I don't know how," I replied honestly staring at the rice cooker. Kenma turned away from me and stifled a laugh, covering his mouth in delight. Tetsu-nii pulled his head out of the fridge and sighed, his arm filled with vegetables and some eggs.

"Kenma, help him with that," he directed laying everything on the counter. I turned to Kenma, who looked up at me with his hand still over his mouth, his eyes dancing with amusement.

"Class six and you can't even make rice," he mused grabbing the pot and filling it with the grains. "You have to clean it," he stated handing it to me. I grabbed the pot and stared at it dumbly. "With water," he added. I nodded filling the pot up with water.

"And then?" Kenma scoffed and nodded his head.

"Mix it around a bit and make sure it's all clean," he explained. As I began shuffling the rice around in the water and in between my fingers, Kenma swooped in beside me dipping his hands in and helping me out. "So you've never cooked before?"

"Never had to, I always bought food at the convenient store after practice," I replied with a subtle shrug.

"What about breakfast?" he asked.

"Coffee," he smirked and nodded his head.

"Why did I expect you to be any different from your brother?"

"Quit your yapping and get cooking," Tetsu-nii lectured cheerful. Kenma grabbed the pot and put it to cook. "We got twenty minutes or so," the eldest mused cutting up the vegetables and making the eggs.

"Since when did you two learned to cook?" I asked taking a seat at the dining table, Kenma sitting in front of me.

"Middle school?" Tetsu-nii questioned turning to Kenma for support.

"Around there," he replied.

"Mom kind of got swamped at work at one point and Auntie and Uncle's job schedule hasn't changed since forever, so it was just us after school for hours. We ended up using Mom's old cookbooks and the internet to make simple meals," he explained. "So, what were meals like with Dad?" he asked plopping down at the head of the table. I shrugged, fiddling with my fingers mindlessly.

"Quiet," I replied recalling the first dinner I had when I came back here. "We usually order in food or the maid would cook," I replied.

"Maid?" both of them exclaimed.

"Well she wasn't really a maid, she was the housekeeper. We didn't have the time to clean or do chores around the place, so he hired someone to do them for us," I explained.

"The bastard's loaded, huh?" Tetsu-nii mused with a frown.

"Don't call your father a bastard," I scoffed.

"Well he is one, for what he—" Tetsu-nii stopped as I glared at him. His eyes shifted to the corner at Kenma before going back to me. "Right," he sighed scratching the back of his head. The conversation died down; Kenma staring with curiosity in eyes, although he didn't persist. As Tetsu-nii finished up cooking, teaching me how to do it along the way, the atmosphere lighted up.

"It's good," I stated in shock as I took a bite.

"Of course it's good! I made it," he grinned. I laughed and nodded my head.

"I'm surprise," I smiled happily. Mother came home at seven, amaze by our little dinner. Kenma left at eight, his parents returning from their day out together. I walked him to the entrance and he looked up at me with a pleasant smile.

"I'll see you tomorrow," he stated.

"Yea," I whispered, smiling back. After locking the door behind him, Mother called for me from the living room. When I poked my head in, she was eating at the dinner table, Tetsu-nii sitting on the couch with a book in his hand.

"What time are you coming home tomorrow?" she asked looking up from her food.

"Not sure," I replied. Sighing, she nodded her head.

"Just be safe," she chimed shooing me away. Returning to my room, I began finishing my homework from yesterday, not wanting to accidentally forget to do something tomorrow. There was a knock on my door and Tetsu-nii walked in before I could say anything. I smirked and nodded my head in acknowledgement.

"Do you need something?" I asked.

"If you wanted to go on a date with Kenma, you could've just told me," he sighed exaggeratedly, falling onto my bed as if he were a fair maiden, the back of his hand pressed against his forehead pretending he were distress.

"First off, it's not a date. Second, how do you know about it?" I asked sitting in my chair backwards to face him.

"I'm a god; I overheard you two talking about it," he grinned, giving me a cheeky wink. I rolled my eyes and shook my head in disbelief. The room was quiet as my brother stared up at the ceiling and I stared at him.

"So, uh… where would be a good place to take him?" I asked averting my eyes to the floor. Chuckling, I could see Tetsu-nii turn to me in my peripheral vision.

"There's this nice café that sells sweets and appetizers. It's not a full on restaurant so it doesn't seem like an official date, but it's also sophisticated enough to be more than casual," he advised.

"You know, for a pain in the ass, you really are sweet," I smiled finally looking back up at him.

"What are brothers for if not to bug the hell out of you until it really matters?" he chuckled. I chuckled back and nodded my head. "But hey, I thought you didn't like him?" Tetsu-nii teased.

"I don't," I replied coldly. He sighed and sat up, nodding his head in disappointment.

"Right, got it, of course," he muttered. "Just tell me when you do. My room's right down the hall," he smirked getting up and leaving. Sighing, I went over to my bed and collapsed.

I didn't like Kenma. I _didn't_ like him. Any part of me that thought I did was wrong. I was just confuse. Back when we were children, I'll admit, I _did_ like him; but that doesn't mean I like him _now_. I was just confusing the happiness of reuniting with an old friend with the happiness of finding a long lost lover. Any romantic feelings I had were misguided. "Right?" I whispered looking out the window over at Kenma's house. "I'm pathetic," I muttered burring my face into my pillow.

 _To deny every part of me, because I'm scared to get hurt; how pathetic._ On my third day back, Tetsu-nii told me that he didn't want me to resent who I am because I was afraid of getting hurt, but it's much easier said than done. My own father rejected me, hated me to the point that he literally kicked me out of my home. Yes, my mother accepted me. Yes, my brother accepted me. Yes, my friends accepted me. But my father didn't, and not everyone in the world will. Of course Kenma would accept me—he accepted my brother. But who's to say he would accept my feelings? The very feelings I was trying to deny right now.

"Tomorrow will be a better day," I sighed.


	6. Together

"Morning," I greeted as Kenma answered the door. He was wearing white shorts and a white hoodie vest on top of a plain black T-shirt.

"It's not really morning anymore," he murmured putting on his shoes and closing the door as we walked out. I smiled and nodded my head.

"You're right, come on," I coaxed as we headed towards the station.

"So how have you been?" he asked hands shoved into his pockets.

"I've been fine, you?" I replied in kind. Kenma shook his head and turned to me.

"I meant how have you been all these years? We haven't spoken to one another since elementary school. We saw each other during volley matches, but I never found the courage to go talk to you," he explained. My heart began to throb as I nodded. _He didn't mean it like that._

"I've been… fine," I repeated. "There's really nothing to talk about. My life has been pretty dull over the years," I smiled somberly. "What about you?"

"Same," he nodded. It was quite as we stood on the platform, waiting for the train to arrive. "Did you make new friends?" he asked. I surpassed a chuckle and nodded my head.

"Eventually. When I first moved, I didn't really make any friends. It honestly took me until last year to make some," I replied.

"Your team?" he inquired as we boarded the train.

"Yea," I mused softly as we took a seat. "But how about you? I know you have a really hard time with people. Did you ever make any other friends?" he shrugged teetering his head back and forth.

"Not until high school too," he answered. "It was honestly only because of Kuro, since I don't like people very much," he muttered. "But I did make friends with a guy from Karasuno on my own," he added.

"Really? That's interesting," I smiled. "Did your anxiety get better?" I asked a stranger sitting down beside Kenma. The blond squirmed as he moved closer to me.

"N-no," he stammered his eyes darting beside him for a second. Instinctively I wrapped an arm around him and pulled him closer.

"Is this okay?" I asked hesitantly after realizing what I was doing.

"Thank you," he whispered taking a deep breath.

"So, why'd you dye your hair?" I questioned, trying to help him get his mind off of things.

"I didn't want to stand out," he shrugged.

"So you dyed it blond?" I replied skeptically.

"I like having my hair long, but it made me look like Sadako," he paused. "It was Yamamato's idea," he added in his defense. Chuckling, I nodded my head. We continued chatting away as we exited the train and headed to the café that Tetsu-nii recommended; my arm no longer wrapped around him. When we arrived we were seated near the window. To no one's surprise, Kenma ordered a slice of apple pie and I ordered onigiri. "Can I ask you something personal?" he stated as the waiter walked away with the menus.

"Uh, sure," I replied sitting up nicely.

"Last night you got upset at Kuro when he mentioned something about your father," he muttered, his eyes glued to the table. "I was wondering, what was it that your dad did to you and why did you move here so suddenly?" he questioned lifting his eyes at me, his head still tilted down. I took a deep breath and nodded.

"Ah, well…" I gulped. "It's because… well, see… um…" Kenma reached across the table and grabbed my hands.

"You don't have to say it," he hummed. "Just tell me when you're ready to," he smiled softly. Closing my eyes, I smiled back.

"Thank you," I sighed. I wanted to tell him, I really did. But I was afraid of how much I would slip. And even more so, I was afraid he would think that I had ulterior motives.

"So are you happy being back?" he asked pulling his hands away.

"I am," I smirked. "My mother and Tetsu-nii have been really great to me. And it's not like my school life or volleyball has change. Plus I get to see you again," I replied, mentally lecturing myself for that last part. "Although I'll have to admit, I miss having my privacy and some decent sleep,"

"Sorry about that," he hummed his lips pressing into a thin white line. I shook my head.

"It's not you I'm referring to. Since I live much farther away from school, I have to wake up much earlier," I explained.

"That must suck,"

"No kidding," the two of us laughed softly before quieting down. The waiter returned with our food and we began to eat in peace, silently listening to the background noise of the radio and other patrons. "Is it good?" I questioned as he ate happily. Kenma's eyes sparkled as he looked up at me and nodded enthusiastically.

"I take it your food is really good too?" he mused wiping his mouth with the back of his hand like a cat.

"Why do you say that?" I hummed.

"You've already eaten three of them," he pointed out. I turned to my food and smiled.

"I'll let you have a bite of mines, if you give me a bite of yours," I offered looking at him once again, one of the triangles in my hand. Kenma skimmed back and forth between me and his pie with a very serious expression as he contemplated.

"Fine," he finally sighed as if in defeat. I chuckled as I lifted the onigiri to him. Grabbing my hand, he took a bite. As he chewed he scooped a piece of the pie and lifted the fork to me. Embarrassed, I ate from the utensil. Isn't it weird for friends to be feeding each other? Was I just overthinking it? "It's good," he stated.

"It is," I replied with a soft smile. Overthinking or not, it was certainly pleasant. Suddenly, Kenma blushed and looked down at his food. "Is something wrong?" I questioned, unsure by his suddenly red cheeks.

"It's just that… you're really attractive," he muttered. "I know we're friends and all, but you're really good looking. I mean, I know some people think Kuro is attractive but," he looked up at me and smirked. "He's nothing compared to you," I blushed and nodded my head dumbly. "I guess its Kuro's fault for me saying all of this, sorry. He always brought up how attractive you got," he sighed.

"Does he now?" I groaned softly. "How often did he talk about me after I moved?" I questioned.

"A lot actually. He brought you up every week, if not every day," Kenma replied with a soft shrug.

"Did he now?" I sighed, bring my palm to my forehead.

"You should be flatter," he hummed continued to eat. I gave him a look, my mouth too full to speak. "He missed you and constantly reminded me to miss you too," he replied.

"So, you missed me?" I teased.

"Well you were my best friend," he reasoned.

"Tetsu-nii wasn't?" I frowned tilting my head to the side. Kenma smirked and shook his head.

"I mean maybe now, but back then, of course it was you. You were actually my age and you didn't dragged me around and forced me out of my house to play volleyball," he reasoned. I chuckled and nodded me head. "Now that I think about it, I'm surprise you didn't have anyone in your life," he muttered. I gulped and furrowed my brows.

"Really?" I stuttered. He nodded.

"Like I said, you're attractive. I thought that there was bound to be someone," he shrugged nonchalantly. _Just tell him you're gay!_ My thoughts screamed.

"I'm not really keen on relationships," I reasoned.

"True," he hummed. As we finished up I paid for the meal, much to Kenma's dismay. As we walked around the blond groaned. "I hate the heat," he grumbled softly. The sun was high up in the clear blue sky, peering down at us with intense heat. The trees along the sidewalk shaded us from the light, yet the warm, humid air still clung to us.

"Should we go back home?" I suggested checking the time.

"No, its fine," he replied quickly shaking his head. "We should just find a place to stay. The heat makes me light headed," he added.

"I know where to go then," I smiled leading the way. "It's a moment's walk if you don't mind," he sighed but shook his head.

"I'll be fine," he muttered. As we walked, the two of us talked openly. At some point, a large crowd began to form, walking both with us and against us. Immediately, Kenma stopped talking, shutting his eyes and taking a deep shaky breath. As people brushed against him, he tensed up and squeezed his hand.

"Hey," I called out to him, wrapping my arm around his shoulder again. "Better?" I whispered.

"Yea, much," he uttered in a quivering breath. In absolute silence, I led him to the fountain and sat him down, the misty water cooling our skin.

"You really don't like strangers touching you," I noted letting go of him. Kenma took a deep breath and sighed.

"After you moved away, I kind of started getting bullied. It wasn't that big of a deal—Kuro usually dealt with them for me. But because of it, I get kind of nervous when people touch me," he explained.

"I'm so sorry," I frowned placing a hand on his back.

"It's not your fault," he replied.

"If I had stayed—"

"It wasn't your choice to go," he interrupted holding my knee. "Don't feel guilty for something you had no control over. Sometimes things are inevitable, they're meant to happen. We just have to accept it," he preached.

"Since when did you get so philosophical?" I questioned pulling my hand away.

"Since I had to go to your brother for comfort," he scoffed. I chuckled softly and nodded.

"Yea, he gets like that," I smiled.

"Did you know he calls me the brains of the team? He makes us do this embarrassing chant before each match about everyone being the blood that helps the oxygen get to the brain," he sighed.

"I think it's sweet," I chuckled.

"It's embarrassing. Although—admittedly—sweet," he smiled softly. "Don't tell him I told you that," he added bluntly.

"I know nothing," I mused. Kenma nodded approvingly, removing the hand he had left on my knee.

"So you really never cooked rice before?" he snickered. Grimacing, I covered my face in shame.

"Please don't remind me of my idiocy," I cried out. Kenma laughed and bumped my shoulder with his.

"It's alright, we all have something we're good at," he hummed.

"What's yours?" I taunted bring down my hands.

"Videogames," he replied candidly. With a smiled, I nodded.

"Of course," the rest of the afternoon went well, the two of us finally returning home once the heat got unbearable. "The summer training camp is in two weeks," I pointed out as we stood in the train car.

"Yea," he muttered cynically. I smiled, nudging him with my elbow.

"Why don't we both get the courage to talk to one another this time, hmm?" I smirked. Although frowning, he nodded his head in agreement. When we returned home, Kenma stopped right before his house.

"I had fun," he stated looking at the ground.

"Me too," I mused. Kenma looked up at me and turned away with a smile.

"See you tomorrow," he waved walking away.

"Yea," I murmured turning in to my own house. Soaking in the bath, I sighed deeply. "I like Kenma," I stated out loud to myself. "Oh god," I groaned covering my face. I actually liked him. As much as I wanted to deny it—as much as I wanted to stay friends—I liked him. I liked everything about him. I liked his feline features and his nervous habits. I liked his upfront personality and his cold demeanor. I liked his excited smile and his golden eyes. I just really liked him. I sat, silently contemplating, when the thought of my father suddenly came into mind. Although I understood Tetsu-nii's rage and bitterness towards him, I myself still couldn't find it in me to hate him.

Of course, my mother was more nurturing to me in the past month and a half that I had been here, compared to the several years I had lived with him. But you can't compare apples to oranges. Father was loving and caring in his own way. It's not like I had gone my entire life ignored and shunned by him. He's told me he has been proud of me several times before. We've celebrated our successes with one another. As I said, we must have been close to one another at some point. Even though he hurt me—even though he rejected me—I couldn't ignore the past. He was my father. He was the one who raised me and I couldn't ignore that. Tetsu-nii could go his entire life hating him, but he didn't know our father like I did. Even if my father could say that he hated me with all his heart and mean it, I don't know if I would be able to say the same.

Sighing, I submerged myself deeper into the water until my nose barely peered above it. Now that I thought about it, I never asked the upperclassmen about their story. Although I now had my brother to go to, it wouldn't be the same. He didn't have to struggle like I did; not that I'm deeming any struggle he had to go through. It's just that, he could've easily accepted himself for who he was and have been just as easily accepted by our mother. I strived for years trying to figure out if what I was feeling were true, and if so, what they meant. I denied myself of happiness and ended up shutting myself in. That is, until I met Bokuto and everyone else.

Even without knowing my inner turmoil, they gave me a safe place to be whoever I wanted and accepted me for that. I was non-responsive, sometimes even cold, but they enjoyed my company nonetheless. Getting dressed, I returned to my room and attempted to study. During dinner Mother asked me how my day went. Noticing Tetsu-nii's teasing glances, I briefly summarized it as "really nice."

"I'm glad," she replied with a proud smile. After dinner, I walked over to my brother's room.

"Hey, Tetsu-nii," I muttered knocking on his door.

"Yea?" he chimed as I walked in flopping down onto his bed.

"I want your help," I sighed. Turning around to look at me, he gave me a smug expression.

"Oh?" he chirped. "With?"

"Don't make me say it," I glowered.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he teased. I sighed, sitting up and grabbing his shoulders from behind.

"I like Kenma and I need you to help me," I said in defeat.

"You can always count on me," he smirked leaning back to look up at me.

"Good, because I'm beginning to lose faith in myself," I sighed falling backwards again.

"What do you mean?" he asked turning fully around to face me.

"I don't know how much longer I can act casual. I kept on questioning myself on whether I was just trying to be nice or if I had ulterior motives," I clarified frowning up at the ceiling. "I like Kenma; both in a romantic way and a platonic way,"

"No need to worry! With my help, you won't fail!" he laughed sitting on the bed beside me.

"Don't get cocky," I frowned pushing myself up.

"Don't get discouraged," he scoffed pushing me back down. With a sigh, I laid there in silence.

"Is there no one in your life?" I asked examining the white ceiling closely. Tetsu-nii laughed wryly.

"No one. My love life is taking its sweet time," he exhaled.

"Maybe I can hook you up in return for you helping me," I joked. My brother laughed, playfully slapping my stomach.

"As if. I'm helping you two out of the goodness of my heart," I sat up and raised a brow.

"What heart?" I questioned.

"Get out," he snickered shoving me softly. Smiling, I got up and left.

"Thank you. Like, honestly, thank you," I said looking over my shoulder at him.

"Anything for my little brother," he smiled giving me a little salute as I closed the door.


	7. A Favor or Two

The whistle blew and we began cleaning up the gym for the day. "You're in a good mood," Shirofuku smiled pointing a slender finger at me.

"I hadn't noticed," I shrugged with a casual smile. Chuckling she gave me a wink, but said no more. As I changed, Bokuto pounced on me. "Yes, Bokuto? Do you need something?" I hummed, my shirt halfway on as I turned to him.

"I need you to tutor me!" he bellowed dropping onto his knees with his hands clasp together. "The training camp starts at the end of next week and I have a huge test coming up. If I fail it I won't be able to go," he explained. Sighing I shuffled my shirt on.

"And you want me to help you?" I mused. He nodded vigorously. "What about the other third years? Wouldn't they be better teachers?" I frowned.

"But you're the smartest, Akaashi!" he cried out. "Come on, please?" he begged.

"Fine," I muttered in defeat. "But only on the weekends. I live kind of far and taking the train so late at night would be a pain," I added.

"Ah well," he stammered getting to his feet. "I was kind of hoping we can do it at your place like we used to," he mumbled scratching the back of his head nervously.

"You do realize I don't live in the same house anymore, right?" I frowned.

"Of course, I know that!" he whined. "It's just… I don't like studying at home, I get distracted too easily," he pouted. I nodded, packing all of my stuff into my bag.

"Fine," I scoffed in defeat. "We can study after practice on Saturday and all of Sunday," I suggested.

"I can't do Saturday. I have a dentist appointment," I stared at him with unamused eyes and nodded.

"Fine," I repeated. "Sunday then, starting at noon," Bokuto nodded eagerly a glimpse of happiness in his eyes as he thanked me. "Of course, I'm you're vice-captain after all," I sighed before bidding him farewell. When I arrived home, everyone was in their individual rooms—although both Tetsu-nii and Mother shouted out a greeting. I took a quick shower and returned to my room to start on my homework. As I studied, my thoughts wandered. I wasn't ashamed of my new home, and I obviously wasn't ashamed of my mother or Tetsu-nii. Yet for some undeclared reason, I wasn't completely comfortable with Bokuto coming over and I wasn't sure why. As I continued to work, Tetsu-nii suddenly barged in, flopping down onto my bed. "What's wrong with you?" I huffed.

"Nothing," he muttered, sitting up nicely. "I had a girl confess to me after class though," he informed.

"That's an odd coincidence," I frowned recalling last night's conversation. "What did you say?"

"I kindly rejected her," he shrugged.

"Did you now?" I hummed skeptically.

"Of course, I did. Why wouldn't I?" he frowned slightly offended by my tone. I shrugged back and turned around to face him.

"Last night you were complaining about your love life being slow, yet here's somebody throwing themselves to you and you turn them down? It doesn't add up, is all," I replied hollowly.

"I'm not complaining about my love life. I'm honestly just waiting for someone I actually have interest in. I'm not going to say yes to some random stranger because they're infatuated by me. The whole world can throw themselves onto my feet, yet it means nothing if I don't feel at least a fraction of what they're feeling. Yes, I want someone in a romantic way, but I'm not going to just used somebody to satisfy my own need. Love is a two way street," he justified.

"You really are preachy," I smiled remember my conversation with Kenma the day before. Tetsu-nii snorted and nodded his head.

"Just keeping it real," he smirked.

"But is there anybody you're interested in?" I questioned looking into his hazel eyes. Tetsu-nii smiled somberly as he gave me a halfhearted shrug.

"No one that I'm serious about. Just minor interest," he answered.

"Why not give it a shot? You're an absurd risk taker, what's stopping you?" I hummed.

"Thanks," he replied sarcastically. "And it's because different school relationships don't really work out," I gave him a look of discomfort and offense but he quickly put his hands up in response. "You and Kenma are different. You two already have history and he literally lives next door. Plus I'm a third year. There really is no reason for me to get into a relationship at this point in time," he reasoned.

"What are the chances you'll go to the same college? Are they a friend of yours?" I asked.

"Kind of," he shrugged. "We get pretty buddy-buddy when we see each other, but we're not necessarily friends. At least I don't think we are. We're not close is what I mean," he replied.

"Well get closer to them. At least become friends, so that when the opportunity ever arrives, you'll have an advantage," I advised. Tetsu-nii chuckled and shook his head.

"It's fine, honestly. Like I said, it's just a minor interest; a puppy crush, if you will," he smirked waving it off. "Anyways, it's almost time for dinner," he stated getting up and patting my back before leaving. As he walked away, I pondered. What was really stopping him? During dinner, Mother informed us that Auntie was going to be gone for a business trip starting Friday and that Kenma would be staying with us for the time being. Tetsu-nii gave me a teasing smirk and I kicked him from underneath the table.

* * *

The end of the week approached in a blink of an eye, my brother texting me during my lunch break on Friday. _"I have a college thing to attend to after school. If it's okay with your team, see if you can get off early to help Kenma move his things. Since he's right next door, there shouldn't be too much of a problem. Also try to pick him up at Nekoma too, he really hates riding the train alone."_

 _"I'll see what I can do."_ I replied putting my phone away as I approached my teammates. "I have to leave practice early by thirty minutes," I stated bluntly.

"Alright then, at least you'll be there at all. Kou is ditching tomorrow completely," the manger hummed nudging our captain.

"I'm not ditching!" he whined childishly. "I have a dentist appointment! My mouth is going to be all numb and I'm gonna drool everywhere and—"

"And we don't want any of that," Komi reassured patting his back.

"It's okay ace! Take a day off, we need the extra practice if we want to keep up with you!" Sarukui smirked. Bokuto shimmered as he nodded his head in approval. I sighed and smiled in contentment as lunch went on in a ruckus of noise and shenanigans. Practice went on as usual and as I slipped away a sudden guilt came over me. I was very dedicated to volleyball, I spent long, hard hours practicing, yet lately I had been distracted. Even when I attended practice, I didn't give it my full undivided attention as I once did before. It's not like I loved volleyball any less, I just wasn't focusing very often. Then again Shirofuku did say that my inner turmoil wasn't affecting my skills.

When I arrived at Nekoma, I stood outside the gym and checked the time. I had about ten minutes to spare. As people start to leave, many of them whispered around me, pointing me out in awe. One man stopped in front of me and stared with large eyes. His mouth was pointed down in a "V" shape and he had tiny blotched eyebrows. He tilted his head and made circles with his fingers as if they were pincers. He was wearing Nekoma's outfit; he was one of their wing spikers I recalled. "Excuse me—"Suddenly, he ran back into the gym and I sighed looking back at the ground.

"And who're you?" a voice snapped. I looked up again and noticed a man with a shaved head and a blond Mohawk. I recognized him as Nekoma's ace.

"I'm looking for Kenma," I stated casually.

"Oi, I asked you who you were, not what you're doing here. But now that you mentioned it, what the hell kind of business does a guy from Fukurodani have with our setter," he grunted clicking his tongue and throwing his head back.

"Cut it out!" another voice shouted. Suddenly the man in front of me fell forward, a shorter man standing behind him with his leg in the air as well as the wide-eyed man next to him. He was Nekoma's libero, and a friend of my brother.

"I'm here to pick up Kenma," I repeated bowing my head to him.

"You wouldn't happen to be Kuroo's brother would you?" he asked squinting his eyes at me in examination as he lowered his leg to stand properly.

"Kuroo's brother?" the guy on the floor shouted suddenly pushing himself up. I nodded before talking a bow.

"I'm Akaashi Keiji, his younger brother. I'm here to pick up Kenma," I stated once again.

"Right, I'll get him. Don't cause any trouble, got it Yamamoto!" he lectured turning to the man sitting on his knees.

"What me? But I didn't do—" he stopped as the Libero glared at him. "Right, sorry Yaku," he sighed.

"So you're Yamamoto," I hummed softly.

"Yea, what of it?" he scoffed getting to his feet, his body staggering in a thuggish manner.

"Nothing, Kenma just mentioned you were the one who suggest he dye his hair," I shrugged remembering the story. Suddenly, the man blushed a look of flustered embarrassment on his face.

"K-Kenma talked about me?" he stuttered in shock. I nodded, unsure of his reaction. When Kenma walked out of the gym, the man immediately threw his arm around him. "We really are friends, aren't we?" he grinned widely.

"Shut up, Yamamoto. You're being loud again," he replied blandly. The man put a hand over his heart as if he had been struck by an arrow.

"You're so cruel," he whimpered still hugging onto the setter.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, ignoring his teammate, another imaginary arrow piercing into his chest.

"Tetsu-nii told me to come get you since you're staying at our house," I explained.

"I don't need a caretaker," he scoffed. I shrugged.

"Maybe you needed a friend?" I replied with a small smirk.

"Maybe," he muttered, although he seemed quite pleased with my answer. "I need to go change first. Come on, Yamamoto," he stated, bring the upbeat man with him. As the two of them walked away, several people from inside the gym poked their heads out and stared at me. Turning to them, I kept my usually deadpan expression. Two of them squeaked and pulled their heads back in, yet the silver haired one continued to gawk.

"Yes?" I hummed. Suddenly he came out from behind the door frame. I looked up in amusement, remembering that he was supposedly half-Russian. The other two ran out grabbing at him and trying to pull him back in. One of them was rather short, the substitute libero, and the other was tall, one of their middle blockers.

"So your Kuroo's brother?" the silver hair chirped.

"I am," I replied coolly.

"How come we've never seen you before?" he questioned bluntly.

"Lev! You can't just ask people strange questions like that!" the shorter one shouted.

"I go to Fukurodani, so I'm not really in the area," I replied.

"Why do you have different family names if you're brothers?"

"Lev, just shut up!" the brunette cried covering the half-Russian's mouth.

"We are _so_ sorry," the shorter one shouted as they ran off.

"Don't mind them, they're all first years," I turned to the front and saw Nekoma's vice-captain with a delicate smile on his face. I bowed my head at him in acknowledgement and he did the same in return. "Kuroo won't be back until late evening," he added.

"Thank you," I stated nodding my head once more to him. He put his hand up and walked away.

"Sorry about that," Kenma stated as he approached me. Smiling, I shook my head.

"Not at all," I hummed. "My team can be just as lively, although only one of us is causing all the noise," I sighed. Kenma smirked and the two of us left. We went to Kenma's place and grabbed all of his luggage that he left in the entrance. After dropping everything off in the living room, I allowed Kenma to shower first. When I finished my own shower, Kenma was playing his videogames, his stuff still bundled in a corner. "So where exactly are you sleeping?" I asked sitting down next to him.

"Well, you see…" Kenma paused his game and turned to me. "There are only three rooms in this house and I usually slept in your old room, but now that you're back…" he trailed off.

"Oh, well," I muttered. "I mean I don't mind sharing my room with you for the time being," I suggested. "Unless that would make you uncomfortable," he shook his head.

"No, it sound fine to me," the two of us got up, bring his things into my room.

"If I had known you were staying in my room, I probably would've cleaned it more," I sighed.

"Are you kidding me? This is pretty spotless compared to my room," he smirked. I smiled back grabbing the futon and extra blankets to make a second bed.

"You can have the main bed," I offered.

"No, its fine," he replied shaking his head. "It's your room, you can have the bed," he reasoned.

"But you're the guest; I wouldn't feel right with you sleeping on the floor," I replied with a frown gesturing him to the bed again.

"We can both sleep on the bed?" he suggested. Blushing I turned to him in speechless shock. "It's big enough for two people and we're both pretty unrelenting," he joked. "Plus we used to sleep together all the time as kids. Not that we're kids anymore, just, you know," he shrugged scratching the back of his head nervously. _Don't get any ideas_ , I shouted at myself in my head.

"Sure, I guess I'll just put this all away," I replied grabbing all of the blankets and returning them to the closet. As I stood there folding them and placing them on the shelf, I buried my head in between two pillows. I had no self-control. When I returned to my room, Kenma had sorted all of his stuff nicely in one area and was playing his videogames with his back against the bedframe. "Do you have any homework?" I asked. Kenma looked up with a guilty expression before looking back at the screen.

"No," he replied. I glared at him, pausing his game and taking the console from his hand.

"Homework first," I lectured. Although pouting, he reached over to his bag and pulled out all of his work. I pulled out the foldable table from underneath my bed and set it up in the middle of my room. The two of us sat beside one another as we did our work. Mother arrived home not too long after and so did Tetsu-nii.

"You're sharing a bed!" Mother cried in horror during dinner when I explained why I didn't make a second bed.

"I feel bad if I force Keiji to sleep on the floor," Kenma replied with a nonchalant shrug.

"I bet if it was me, you wouldn't feel the slightest regret," Tetsu-nii sighed in defeat wiping away an imaginary tear. Kenma glared at him in response.

"That's because Keiji is actually nice," he stated

"I'm plenty nice!" he gasped in disbelief. "Aren't I, Keiji?" he asked turning to me with a wink.

"You are," I sighed unwillingly. He _was_ trying to be my wingman, I might as well let him have something. Mother frowned, but didn't protest after realizing we were both content with the outcome. As night fell, we each retreated back to our own room.

 _"Don't get too frisky~"_ Tetsu-nii texted.

_"In your dreams."_

_"More like in_ yours _"_ I shook my head and locked my phone.

"Well since I have to wake up earlier than you, you can sleep next to the wall," I reasoned.

"But we don't have school tomorrow," he noted.

"Well, we might as well get used to it, hmm?" I reasoned.

"Thanks," he murmured softly crawling underneath the covers. As I shut off the light, I slipped into the bed beside him. He was curled up onto his side, he's back facing me. I laid staring straight up at the ceiling, one of my arms draped across my forehead. Time seemed to have skipped around in an inconsistent manner. "Keiji, are you still awake?" Kenma whispered softly.

"Yea," I replied looking over at the time; three forty-five.

"I can't sleep," he added shuffling around a bit.

"Why's that? Should I get my own bed tomorrow?" I questioned removing my arm from my head and turning to look at him.

"No," he muttered softly. "I just can't sleep," it was quite for a moment; I wasn't sure how to respond. "Goodnight, Keiji," he whispered pulling the blanket up around his shoulder.

"Yea," I mumbled back. "Goodnight,"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My physical health has plummet and I was rushed to urgent care yesterday. Due to the amount of new appointments and studies I have to go to, I won't be able to continue uploading two chapters a week. The story will be coming to an end soon as well. Thanks for reading!


	8. Secret Admirers and Admirees

I laid wide awake as I listened to Kenma breath. At some point in the night, he rolled over. His hands were pressed against my back, one of them clutching onto my clothes. I had been lying in bed for over an hour in hopes of him waking up on his own, but to no avail. Honestly, I was surprise I was able to fall asleep at all last night.

"Kenma," I coaxed. The blond mumbled, his head slumping forward until he rested his forehead in between my shoulder blades. "Kenma," I repeated.

"Don't," he muttered stirring a bit. Sighing, I laid there a little longer. "Promise you'll come back," he stated still fully asleep. "Promise," he repeated in a slow exhale.

"Kenma," I said patiently awaiting some sort of response. "I promise," I stated softly as I turned around to face him. Grumbling in his sleep, I rearranged his head to a more comfortable position. Slipping out of bed, I walking into the hallway were Tetsu-nii was.

"Morning, Casanova," he greeted a cup of coffee in his hand.

"You're supposed to be my wingman, yet I seem to be doing all the work by myself," I sighed heading to the bathroom.

"Well, you are an owl. You got your own wings," I glared at him from over my shoulder and he put his arms up in defeat. "I know, I know," he chuckled as I left to get ready for club activities.

* * *

"Practice is really uneventful without Bokuto," Komi frowned from the other side of the net as he received everyone's spike.

"It's actually quite sad," Sarukui added slamming down the ball as I set it.

"Since when did we pick chaos over peace," Konoha sighed as he readied to spike the next ball.

"Well, he is our captain," I hummed. Suddenly the whistle blew.

"Quit talking," Coach Yamiji shouted.

"Sorry," we all called back. We played several practice matches with one another, yet everything felt off without Bokuto.

"No Bokuto is almost as bad as no Akaashi," Sarukui snickered as we all changed in the club room.

"Really? What's it like without me around?" I asked as I finished up tying my tie.

"Bokuto is depressed twenty-four seven," Konoha whistled before chuckling. "As much as we can cheer him up, nothing gets him back on his feet faster than a good, clean spike," he explained buttoning up his shirt. Smirking, I nodded my head.

"He may act like a child, but he certainly is our captain," I chuckled.

"And we all love him for it," Komi chimed in.

"And for everything else about him," Konoha added nudging he shorter male. After leaving the club room, I returned home. When I arrived, Tetsu-nii and Kenma were still out with the rest of their team.

"Welcome home," Mother chimed when I walked in.

"Thanks," I replied walking into the living room where she sat on the couch once again reading with the TV running as background noise.

"Any plans?" she asked.

"Just gonna wash off," I shrugged.

"Once you finish showering, keep me company," she grinned. Smiling back I nodded my head.

"Of course," I replied before walking away. As I washed myself, I thought back to this morning. Kenma was muttering in his sleep and I was curious to know if it really was me he was talking to in his dreams. The first time I caught him asleep in the dining room, he was talking to me about returning. He mentioned me promising to come back, just like how he mentioned it once more this morning. If he really was referring to me; why was I in his dream and what was it about? As I dried my hair I looked into the mirror and frowned softly. The only person getting my hopes up, was me. If Kenma rejects me, could I handle just being friends? I returned to the main room, Mother still reading her book.

"How was practice?" she chirped putting a bookmark in and setting it down on the table in front of her.

"It was fine, kind of quiet since Bokuto wasn't there," I replied taking a seat next to her. The two of us talked for a while until she suddenly sighed, cupping my cheek in her hand. "Is something wrong?" I asked putting my hand over hers.

"Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I had kept you both," she answered with a sigh, kissing my forehead.

"It's not your fault," I smiled taking her hand from my face and holding it in between mine. "To be honest, my upbringing wasn't the worst. Father wasn't a bad man; he still isn't one. Yea, he did some cruel things to me near the end of it, but honestly—with all my heart—I don't hate him for it. They say it takes seven good things to counteract one bad, and I can say, with complete confidence, that he was a good man. You shouldn't judge him for how things ended," I stated sincerely.

"You're a good boy Keiji," Mother hummed softly as she closed her eyes. "But you're not the only reason why I dislike your dad so much. We were divorced for a reason," she opened her eyes, a sad smile painted across her aging face. This was the first time I was realizing the bags and wrinkles she accumulated over the years. She had looked so timeless, as if permanently stuck in this age of beauty. Yet here I was, close enough to see every pore on her face and I still thought she was gorgeous.

"Why did you guys even split?" I questioned.

"Your father didn't tell you?" she scoffed. I shook my head in response. "Well, I'm not surprise. Your father and I had never really been happy with one another. When we were young and more carefree, things seemed to have been going great. Then one day, I got pregnant with your brother. The two of us decided to keep the baby, thinking that the power of love would keep us together. But it obviously didn't. Not long after having Tetsurou, I got pregnant with you. Once again we fooled ourselves into thinking that we could've worked it out. As you guys began to grow, we came to the realization that we weren't happy with one another; that we weren't really in love.

"Nonetheless, we stayed together for you two but decided to have an open married. Everything was going fine, we had no troubles with each other dating someone else—in reality it made us happier knowing that we could still find happiness even if it wasn't with one another. One day though, your father caught me with a women. As you know, I'm bisexual, so being with a women really didn't mean anything to me. But your father was rather—well, let's just say that he wasn't happy with it. We argued and decided that it would be better if we just divorced. And we did. And he took you with him," she explained her thumb rubbing back and forth against the back of my hand.

"You guys had been unhappy for so long?" I hummed softly.

"Oh please, don't blame yourself for this. We were young and naïve. Young love makes you wild sometimes, nothing more," she smiled. Eventually Tetsu-nii and Kenma returned. The four of us had dinner, happily taking about our day. Once again, Kenma and I fell asleep with our backs toward each other, although this time they were touching.

The following morning, I woke up to the sound of the front door being slammed shut and somebody shouting. I groaned softly burying my face into something soft. The shouting continued and Kenma sighed. "Let's go," he muttered. I opened my eyes and noticed that my arms were wrapped around him as he cuddled into my chest. The two of us looked at each other before quickly pulling apart.

"Sorry," I stammered getting out of bed.

"Its fine," he replied shaking her head. "Let's just see what the noise is all about," he suggested. The two of us walked out of my room and down towards the entrances.

"What's with all the noise—?"

"Akaashi!" I put a hand to my head as I finally remember that Bokuto was coming over.

"Good afternoon to you too, Bokuto," I sighed as Kenma sneaked away into the bathroom.

"Why didn't you tell me Kuroo was your brother?" he shouted in disbelief. I looked up at the two of them, their faces brightly red, and my brother topless.

"Up until I moved, I wasn't really in contact with him, so I didn't feel like it was right to parade that information around," I replied.

"You guys have different surnames!" he yelled.

"Like I said, we hadn't been living together. I use my father's surname and he uses our mother's," I explained. "Now please calm down, while I go brush my teeth," I stated turning around. As I left to the bathroom—Kenma walking out and agreeing to make me coffee—Tetsu-nii hurried to grab a shirt and followed after me.

"Why didn't you tell me Bokuto was coming over?" he hissed in a hushed voice. Brushing my teeth, I shrugged.

"Didn't realize I had to," I replied spitting into the sink and gargling.

" _The_ Bokuto Koutarou is in my house," he practically shrieked grabbing ahold of my shoulders.

"Does it matter? I thought you guys got along?" I questioned as my brother vigorously shook me.

"He's the fifth best ace in all of Japan! Of course I'm going to fangirl about this!" he snapped his face practically glowing.

"Fangirling, huh?" I smirked. Tetsu-nii let out a frustrate roar as he shook me wildly before storming out. Chuckling I walked into the main living area after him. Bokuto sat at the dining table with his bag set down beside him. Kenma was on the couch trying to play his games, his eyes darting across the room where the ace sat. I walked over to the blond and he handed me my cup of coffee. I thanked him and moved over to Bokuto.

"Why didn't you tell me Kuroo was your brother? I've literally talked about him in front of your face so many times," he cried out quietly so that my brother wouldn't hear from the kitchen.

"Why does it matter?" I frowned.

"Cause he's hot!" he whimpered covering his entirely red face.

"Kenma, do you still have homework you need to do?" I called looking over at the setter. He looked at me and turned back to his games. "Kenma, do your homework," I lectured. Grumbling softly, he got up and the two of us grabbed our things from my bedroom. "Kenma, Bokuto. Bokuto, Kenma,"

"Hi," Bokuto muttered still hiding behind his hand.

"Hi," Kenma mumbled as well scratching the back of his head and looking away.

"Nii-chan, if you have homework, you should do it with us," I stated. He glared at me but immediately stopped when Bokuto turned to look at him.

"Might as well," he replied heading to his room. _"What the hell do you think you're doing!"_ he texted.

_"I'm being your wingman, because—you know—I'm an owl,"_ I mocked.

_"Fuck you Keiji"_ I chucked and placed my phone back into my pocket. When Tetsu-nii returned with his material, we all began doing our school work.

"Hey Tetsu-nii, since you and Bokuto are in the same grade why don't you help him?" I suggested. "I'll help Kenma out instead," I added.

"Sure," he shrugged nonchalantly, suddenly returning to his cool non-expressive self. I smiled back and nodded my head. Quickly, Bokuto turned to me with a worried glance, but I patted his shoulder reassuringly. As we continued working—I helping Kenma, Tetsu-nii helping Bokuto—I realized that the two third years were getting off topic, suddenly becoming buddy-buddy with one another.

"Get to work or else I'm going to start tutoring you again. If you fail you won't be able to go to the summer camp," I taunted. Bokuto gulped and nodded his head.

"Right, work!" he shouted as he stared at his papers.

"You won't be able to go to the summer camp?" Tetsu-nii questioned shuffling in his seat to better see Bokuto's textbook. Bokuto sighed and shook his head.

"I'm kind of stupid," he hummed softly. I turned to him, about to say something encouraging when Tetsu-nii cut me off.

"Nonsense! I've seen you play volleyball, you're a genius!" he chimed with a wide grin.

"Really?" he replied in awe. "I just play by instinct, so I can't really say I'm a genius," he gushed modestly scratching the back of his head.

"That's even better! Don't you see? That means you got a killer gut instincts," he pointed out. Suddenly, Bokuto shimmered just like when he hits a perfect spike.

"Thanks bro!" he shouted enthusiastically.

"Of course! I got your back, bro!" I sighed and turned to Kenma who had a look of disgust on his face.

"Come on," I chuckled as I helped him out. Several hours had passed, before Bokuto and Kenma collapsed from mental exhaustion. "We'll take an hour long break," I declared. Kenma lit up as he scurried to the couch and began playing his games. Longingly, Bokuto watched from the dining room.

"Hey Kenma, why don't you let us play to?" Tetsu-nii asked plopping down beside him. The blond eyed my brother and then my captain before sighing.

"Fine," he whispered. Bokuto cheered as he fell into the seat beside my brother. With a small smile, I moved over onto the other side of Kenma and watched in peace. Throughout the game, Tetsu-nii and Bokuto bantered, Kenma silently pulverizing them. At some point they convinced me to play as well. The four of us played several round, one half of the couch screaming and yelling with every action on the screen, while the other half just watched in anticipation.

Eventually, we returned to studying, much to Bokuto and Kenma's dismay. Bokuto ended up staying for dinner before returning home, actually having learned a lot from my brother. Before he left, the two exchanged numbers under the guise that if Bokuto needed additional help he could always just message him. As we all readied ourselves to go to sleep, I walked into my brother's room. "So Bokuto, huh?" I teased.

"What are you talking about?" he scoffed.

"Different schools, not really friends, but becoming super friendly when around one another. I don't know, the flustered mess you two were in," I smirked.

"Out," he ordered. Nodding, I turned away. "Thanks for being my wingman," he stated motioning to his phone. When I returned to my room Kenma was already lying in bed.

"If we end up hugging each other, let's not make it weird," he muttered closing his eyes. Blushing, I smiled a bit and turned off the lights.

"Goodnight, Kenma,"

"Goodnight, Keiji,"


	9. Summer Camp

"I can't for the training camp tomorrow!" Bokuto cheered running around in circles with his arms in the air as practice came to an end.

"Bokuto, calm down!" the mangers shouted trying to pin him to the ground. He wiggled around in their grasp, his eyes glistening like stars. Walking over to him, I sighed and patted him on the shoulder.

"Good job on your test," I complimented.

"All thanks to Kuroo!" he chirped gratefully.

"Kuroo?" Komi repeated. "You don't mean Nekoma's Kuroo do you?" he frowned.

"I do!" he chimed. "Kuroo is Akaashi's brother!" Suddenly the entire team, including the mangers, turn to me in shock.

"Well, it was eventually going to come out during the summer training camp," I sighed bring a hand up to my forehead. "It's true, Nekoma's captain is my older brother," I clarified.

"But surnames?" Onaga stated unable to form a coherent sentence.

"My parents are divorced. I use my father's and he uses my mother's," I explained.

"Wait, don't you live with your mom now?" Komi asked. I nodded. The team asked me several questions spanning from how long ago this was to what sort of mental traumas it might have caused me.

"Why'd you even leave your dad's?" Sarukui questioned. Instinctively, I tensed up. Konoha gave a sympathetic look from the crowd and nodded his head reassuringly. Looking to the people beside me, Bokuto nodded as well and Shirofuku gave me a thumbs up. Sighing, I ran a hand through my hair and nodded.

"My father disowned me because… because I am gay," I replied trying hard not to stuttered. The gym was silent for a second before my teammates suddenly pounced on me, all of them wrapping their arms around me in some way.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't know—"

"None of you were supposed to," I sighed cutting off the libero. Nobody spoke up and they continued to hug me. With a small smile, I allowed the warmth to wash over me. "Thank you guys, but we really should get going now," I noted as we stood there for several peaceful moments.

"But Akaashi—!"

"I'm fine, really. It's been two months and I've had a lot of support from my family and some friends," I reassured. Slowly they all let go and backed away with looks of pity and concern. "Please don't treat me any differently," I muttered recalling my biggest fear. Suddenly, Komi slapped me on the back.

"Of course not!" he hollered. "You're still our vice-captain and our setter, it doesn't change a thing," he grinned, everyone else chiming in in agreement.

"Thank you," I smiled. When I returned home, Mother was prancing around in worry as Kenma and Tetsu-nii stood in the living room. "Something wrong?" I asked.

"Oh! I hate it when you boys have to leave!" she cried throwing an arm around me.

"There, there, Mother. We'll be fine," Tetsu-nii teased rubbing her back soothingly.

"Of course you'll be alright! But what am I going to do without my boys?" she sighed pulling Tetsu-nii into the hug as well. "Kenma, get in here!" she ordered motioning to the other man. With a sigh, Kenma scurried over and hugged her back. Mother sighed and released us with a frown. "You boys grow too fast," she huffed shaking her head.

* * *

The following morning, I left earlier than the other two as usual and met with my team at school. Once again Kenma and I were facing one another, but luckily he wasn't clinging onto me. Everyone stood around chatting amongst themselves like always. Smiling in contentment, I dropped off my stuff with everyone else's things and went up to Bokuto, motioning him to follow me. "What's up, Akaashi?" he asked slurring out my name.

"I wanted to ask you something all week, but I was afraid it would cause you to freak out so I've been saving it up until now," Bokuto nodded, his mouth agape in both confusion and anticipation. "Do you like my brother?" immediately his face redden and he covered it with his hands. "I'll take that as a yes?" I mused with a slight smirk.

"At first, I didn't!" he shouted quickly looking behind him to make sure no one was near enough to hear us. "We met in junior high and I thought he was really good at volleyball. When we got into high school we started having a sort of friendly rivalry," he aggressively whispered. "I just thought he was really cool and really funny and really attractive at first. But then it turns out he's really smart too! We ended up texting about things other than school, and… and…" he covered his face once more and groaned. "Akaashi, what do I do?" he wailed.

"Don't worry, I'll try and help you if I can," I smiled.

"Like my wingman?" he asked looking at me from in between his fingers.

"Sure," I replied with a shrug. Suddenly, he giggled softly like a child.

"Get it, wingman? We're owls!" he chimed completely removing his hands as he grinned widely. I sighed and face-palmed.

"You two would definitely like each other," I muttered.

"Oi, Kou! Akaashi! We're leaving!" Shirofuku yelled waving us over to the bus.

"Coming!" Bokuto chirped rushing over as I casually walked behind him. When we arrived at the other school, Bokuto was cheering and whooping in delight, the rest of the team mimicking him. As we walked to the classroom where we were supposed to stay I noticed Kenma on the other side of the hall. Our eyes made contact and he bowed his head at me. Smiling, I nodded back in acknowledgement. Suddenly, one of his teammates—the Russian first year—pounced on him, Kenma immediately throwing him to the ground. The first year noticed me and waved.

"Hi, Kuroo's brother!" he shouted. Instantly, every pair of eyes in the hallway were turned to me. Tetsu-nii suddenly appeared at the other end of the hallway, assumingly because he heard his name. Half the eyes turned away from me and onto him. Realizing something was amiss Tetsu-nii looked around, locking eyes onto me.

"Yo Keiji!" he called waving a hand at me. Exhaling in amusement, I waved back. From out of nowhere Bokuto threw his arm around me and waved over at my brother.

"What's up, bro?" he shouted cheerfully.

"Nothing much," my brother chimed. As the two of them hollered and shouted across the school's hallways I sneaked away to my original destination.

"They're just as lively as ever," Kenma's voice chirped. Chuckling, I turned around to face him.

"Excruciatingly," he laughed and nodded his head.

"But that's Kuro for you," he huffed. The two of us continued talking as we wandered around the building entering the cafeteria. Everyone was grabbing breakfast and taking a seat wherever they could. Kenma and I sat in the hallway with our backs against the wall. Tetsu-nii and Bokuto eventually found us, several other people following behind them. Everyone chatted away in high spirits, Kenma and I sitting in silent comfort of one another. Kenma eventually started playing his games as I watched, the two of us occasionally putting in a snarky comment or two to bring our captains down a notch.

Soon enough, it was time to actually play volleyball. Everyone hurried to the gym throwing on the colorful jerseys they use during PE class and being assigned teams to play. Much to Bokuto's delight, the first team we were playing against was Nekoma. As we partook in practice matches after practice matches, I played with a new found determination and focus. The clouds that loomed over my head were suddenly gone. During our break in between games, I finally realized what had been wrong. Mother was right back when she said I was feeling guilty for keeping everything to myself. I was the team's backbone, yet I was lying through my teeth. It's their job to put their trust in me, yet I was so fearful of what they might have thought of me, that I couldn't put my trust in them.

"Something wrong?" Komi asked handing me a towel.

"Nothing, just thinking," I replied wiping off my sweat. "I'm glad I came to Fukurodani," I added.

"Well we're glad you're here too," Sarukui hummed patting me on the back. As the night settled in, the third years got to shower first. I was sitting in Nekoma's room beside Kenma when the third years called for the second years to go. As I got up, I approached my brother.

"Can we talk?" I asked. Tetsu-nii gave me a skeptical glance but nodded his head in agreement. The two of us sneaked off into one of the empty hallways, away from everyone else. "Do you like Bokuto?" I asked. My brother scoffed and he turned around to leave. I grabbed his wrist and pulled him back. "Just answer the question," I stated coolly. Tetsu-nii sighed and shook his head, turning around to face me again.

"Not really. I mean, yea, there are some amazing things about him, but it's not like I want to be with him. So I guess yes, I do like him. But I'm not going to pursue anything," he replied dully.

"Why not? You actually have a shot with him?" I inquired.

"Because I'm a _third_ year, Keiji. I'm not going to be a kid anymore. Who knows if we'll even be near each other next year," he answered.

"You're staying in Tokyo and so is he," I informed. Tetsu-nii blushed and covered his face.

"Just drop it. I don't want to date him," he persisted.

"He likes you," I sighed. He looked up from his hands and stared at me with wide-eyed confusion.

"I… Keiji, stop," he muttered walking away again.

"I'm trying to help you!" I fumed.

"Well you're not!" he shouted, whirling around in rage. "Stop trying to help me with my love life and worry about your own! You claim that Bokuto likes me, but you can't even see that Kenma likes you too! And he makes it so goddamn obvious. So instead of helping somebody else, learn to help yourself," he hissed. The two of us stood there glaring at one another, until he clicked his tongue and walked away. "Hurry and take your damn shower," he called over his shoulder. Shaking my head, I went to the shower room.

"Something wrong?" Kenma asked as we got dressed and walked down the hallway.

"You probably know my brother better than I do; do you know why he's so against relationships?" I huffed in defeat. Kenma furrowed his browns and look at the ground.

"He doesn't hate relationships, per say," he mumbled. "It's just that… when your parents who are high school sweethearts, end up growing to hate each other so much, it's hard to have faith in love. Kuro told me that he would never fall in love unless he knew, without a doubt in his mind, that he wanted to be with somebody. So as long as he has doubts of any kind, he probably won't go for it," he replied with a shrug. I stared at Kenma with a longing look, before turning away. _Did he actually feel the same way about me that I did to him?_

"Any clues on how to get rid of those doubts?" I hummed pushing those thoughts out of my mind. From the corner of my eyes, I could see him shake his head.

"Honestly, you can't erase somebody else's doubts; it's only human to have them. But instead you _can_ prove that love is sometimes actually worth getting hurt for," he replied. I turned to look at him again but this time our eyes meet for a second and we both looked away in embarrassment.

"Thanks, Kenma," I murmured slightly blushing.

"Anything for you, Keiji," he replied touching my arm before we split paths. Once I returned to my room, the first years were all getting ready to leave for their bath.

"Everything okay?" Bokuto asked looking up at me with concern eyes. Sighing, I took a seat beside him.

"Because you trusted me with who you like, I'll trust you with who I like, okay?" Bokuto gasped audibly before covering his mouth and looking round nervously, nodding his head with earnest. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. "You know Nekoma's setter?"

"Pudding head?" he questioned. With a smirk, I nodded graciously.

"Yes, pudding head. We use to be childhood friends and I've had a _huge_ crush on him for a long time," I explained. That night, as we waited for our curfew, I told Bokuto everything, from the very first time that I realized I liked Kenma to all the terrible things my father said to me when I came out.

* * *

When morning arrived, Bokuto was the first one on his feet, shouting at everyone else to get up. Displeased, I sat up groaning. The heat was unbearable that day, the blaring AC not lowering the temperature enough to be noticed. As we went along with the schedule, Tetsu-nii acted the same as usual; loud, playful, scheming. Yet the two of us, disacknowledged one another. Kenma, having known the two of us so well, realized something was off, but decided to keep quiet. During our personal practice, I took a break and went outside. Sighing, I leaned against the scorching building, the sun's merciless heat raining down on me. "Everything okay?" I looked over at Kenma who was holding onto the doorframe.

"Fine," I replied unconsciously recalling my brother's words.

"Did something—"

"Please don't," I interrupted. Kenma nodded as he walked up to me, shielding his eyes from the light. He moved in a slow, almost staggering manner, his free hand gripping at the seams of his shirt.

"Keiji, I'm worried about you," he stated swaying softly as the warm, humid air blew.

"Kenma, can— I need to tell you something," I stated, standing up tall as I looked into his golden eyes.

"Y-yes?" he stuttered his cheeks becoming rosy.

"I… I've liked you. Ever since we were kid, I've always liked you. When I came back, my feelings returned, yet they were so much stronger than before. I like you, like _really_ like you," I breathed. Kenma shook his head slowly, blinking his eyes in a prolong manner. Without warning, he keeled over. Instinctively, I reached out for him and collapsed on the ground with him in my arms. "Kenma?" I shouted in shock. "Kenma!"


	10. Mending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this chapter is a few hour late, you can blame my wifi for that. I apologize.

 

"I'm sorry I called you. I know we're in a fight, but you were the only person I could think of to call," I sighed as Tetsu-nii picked up Kenma.

"You're lucky I had my cellphone laying around," he replied as we walked to the infirmary. When we reached there, Tetsu-nii placed him down in the bed and tucked him in. "So, what even happened?" he asked taking a seat in the chair besides the bed and facing me. Sighing, I sat down at the foot of the mattress and ran a hand through my hair, not looking at my brother.

"Believe it or not I confessed," I frowned looking over at the unconscious man. "I think you were wrong; I don't think he feels the same way," I murmured softly.

"Why do you say that?" he huffed in annoyance slouching back into the chair with his arms crossed.

"Look, I know you've been with him longer than I have and I get that you two understand each other better, but he literally shook his head and passed out when I confessed," I glared getting to my feet.

"Keiji—"

"You know what? Maybe you're right. Maybe love just isn't worth it. Like you said, we're still just kids," I scoffed. "I'm going back, I'll tell everyone what happened," I muttered walking out of the room before he could say anything. When I returned to the gym, I told Nekoma that Kenma had passed out and that Tetsu-nii was with him. A commotion was made and soon enough all the team's heard about what happened.

"You okay?" Bokuto asked patting my back.

"Yes, he has my brother. He'll be fine," I replied nonchalantly.

"Well, I mean, I know you like him," he frowned. "You can go wait for him to wake up if you want to. We have back up setters," he offered. Shaking my head, I began walking to the rest of the team.

"It's no big deal, I've moved on. I just want to play some volleyball," I stated.

"But!" he shouted, grabbing my wrist. "What happened?" he frowned, genuinely concern.

"It's nothing—"

"Akaashi! You're my friend! I'm going to continue to worry until you tell me what's wrong," he declared. Sighing, I pried his hand off of me.

"I got rejected, that's all. Let's just go," I hummed motioning him to everyone. Sadly, Bokuto shuffled over to everyone else as I followed close behind. The next several practice matches were slow paced and dull; everyone was put off by what had happened. Tetsu-nii eventually returned, informing everyone that Kenma was fine, he just needed more rest. My ace turned to me somberly and I looked away.

Rejected or not, I still cared for Kenma; I _still_ liked Kenma. My feelings wouldn't evaporate just because he didn't like me back and I _hated_ it. I just wanted to move on—to get on with my life. Tetsu-nii was right; high school relationships were meaningless. Look, at my parents; they thought that they had loved one another, yet now all they felt towards each other was spite and regret. I wanted everything to be okay, I wanted to make up with my brother, I wanted to forget that I even liked Kenma; I just wanted to feel okay.

* * *

Practice came to an end and everyone headed to the cafeteria for dinner. Right away, Bokuto ran up to Tetsu-nii asking him if Kenma was okay. The two of them began talking with serious expressions, before suddenly smiling and lighting the mood. I watched them as they had their arms thrown around one another, cheerfully grinning and yapping away about who knows what. "They're suddenly close," I muttered to myself.

"Nah, those to have always been like that," Komi replied taking a seat beside me. "They've always gotten along since our first year here. Had a sort of rivalry between them, you know," he explained.

"That's what sparked his interest in Nekoma and the reason we started teasing him about it and calling it an obsession," Sarukui chuckled.

"Still can't believe he's your brother though," Konoha laughed.

"Yes," I replied apathetically. Realizing something might have been off, the three changed the subject, taking about volleyball strategies and idle things. Silently, I watched Tetsu-nii and Bokuto talk. They looked happy with one another and they seemed to complement each other well, and not in a romantic "they-seem-destine-for-one-another" kind of way. Just in the simplicity of their personalities.

Both of them were very outspoken people, but in different ways. Bokuto had a one track mind and wouldn't know shame even if he had any. Tetsu-nii, on the other hand, was just a frank person who believed that criticism and critique was the easiest way to help a person out. They were both dreamers, who had an imagination that could hold the universe. Tetsu-nii was actually intelligent though, he knew and understood the world and everything around him. Yet, he wasn't the type to conform to society's bidding. Then there was Bokuto, who—although not the brightest academically—had a knack for knowing exactly what to do in any moment of time. They just fit, and I couldn't see what Tetsu-nii was so afraid of. What doubts did he have?

When dinner ended, several people got together to work on individual practice. As I headed back to the room, Bokuto pounced on me. "Akaashi! Practice with me!" he chirped jubilantly. "I want to work on my spikes!" Sighing in defeat, I followed him to one of the back gyms. Suddenly, my eyes met with hazel.

"Bokuto—"

"I need someone to block against me!" he pouted. Sighing again, I nodded. Several other people were in the gym with us including the Russian, the libero, the substitute libero, and the maneki as well as Konoha, Sarukui, and Washio. We played a few practice rounds, switching out every now and then, Nekoma giving their first years pointers. At some point, the maneki laughed and Konoha's face seemed to shimmer bright red. After an hour or two we all retreated back to our rooms, the third years getting ready to go shower. Before I left, Tetsu-nii grabbed me by the shoulder.

"I want to talk," he stated. Frowning, I followed him to the side of the gym. The sun had set for the day, but the air was still heated and moist. "I'm sorry for how I acted the night before," he sighed. "I know you meant well and I—"

"Please, stop," I sighed.

"What?" he murmured, surprised.

"I forgive you. I just want to put this passed us. I'll stay out of your love life, I just want my brother back," I admitted.

"Keiji," he whispered as he drew me into a hug. "Don't blame yourself," he muttered pulling back and holding my shoulders. "Are we good now?" he asked sincerely.

"Of course," I smiled warmly. "But I do have one favor to ask of you," I added.

"Sure, what is it?" he chimed, putting his arm around my shoulder as we approached the main building.

"Can you lay off how close you are to Bokuto? I know it's not in my place to limit your relationship with your friends, but I've been in his care for more than a year—actually he's been in my care," I muttered to the side before shaking my head. "What I mean is, I don't want you to be leading him on," I stated.

"Oh… well," Tetsu-nii frowned as he tighten his grip around me. "The truth is, I think I may go for it," I turned to him in shock but didn't speak a word. "I want to get to know him more first though. I don't want us to be together on just a hunch," he shrugged. I bumped him with my shoulder and smiled.

"I'm happy for you," I hummed.

"I'm happy for myself too," he chuckled. "But you should really talk to Kenma—"

"Don't," I sighed. Tetsu-nii nodded his head, changing the topic as we continued walking. Eventually, we split off, Tetsu-nii going into the shower room while I went to the classroom. When Bokuto returned, he flopped on top of me. Groaning, I pushed him off and sat up. "You're getting everything wet," I frowned.

"Kuroo confessed to me!" he squealed grabbing me by the shoulders and starting to shake me.

"He did?" I said in disbelief. "What do you mean? What happened?" I practically shouted.

"Akaashi, shh," he hushed putting a finger in front of his grinning lips. "I mean what I said. After we showered, we were walking down the halls together and he told me that he liked me! We're not really dating yet, though. He said he still needs time to figure out if he's ready for a relationship, but I told him it was totally cool, I was just happy being with him!" he glistened.

"I'm happy for you," I smiled. He giggled childishly and nodded his head with enthusiasm.

"I'm happy for myself too!" he cheered. They were already beginning to sound like one another and they weren't even dating. With a sigh, I got up and left to go shower. I stood underneath the running faucet and frowned. I was genuinely happy for the two of them—there was no way I couldn't be—yet I was still bummed out by the failure of my own. Maybe Tetsu-nii was right. He didn't need help with his love life; I did.

In reality Kenma didn't reject me; _I know that_. But what if he does? Would I actually be able to handle him telling me that he didn't feel the same way to my face? Even worse, what if he tells me my feelings are misguided. That I'm confusing the joy of reuniting with my childhood friend with the yearning of a lover. _The exact lie I had been telling myself when I first moved back_ , I recalled with a slight scoff.

Even though Tetsu-nii now believed that love was worth it, I began to lose faith. I didn't know what to think anymore. Even if by some miracle Kenma felt the same about me, would pursuing a relationship be worth it? If we broke up—which would be practical considering our age—would our friendship remain intact? Was I willing to jeopardize a lifelong friendship in return for some futile moments as lovers? Who decided that platonic relationships meant less than romantic ones anyways?

With a heavy sigh, I turned off the water and dressed myself. There was no reason for me to worry about all that anyways; Kenma probably didn't see me like that to begin with. As I walked down the hallways, I came to a sudden stop, my eyes laying on Kenma at the end of the corridor. "Kenma! Are you okay? Should you really be moving around?" I asked walking up to him casually.

"I'm fine," he nodded. "I've actually been awake for a while now. Supposedly I passed out from the heat; I was dehydrated or something," he explained.

"Are you sure you're okay?" I frowned.

"I'm sure… I can say the same to you, though," he muttered looking up at me with his face still tilted down.

"I'm alright," I replied walking passed him. Kenma grabbed my hand causing me to stop.

"Look at me Keiji," he ordered. As I turned to look at him, he grabbed my other hand and held them both in his. "When I woke up, Kuro told me some things. Why didn't you ever tell me your dad disowned you? This whole time I just figured you wanted to be with your mom and brother," he inquired.

"It's embarrassing to admit that I was disowned," I sighed, looming my head.

"Is it because you didn't want to admit that you were gay?" he questioned bending forward so that he could see my face. "You know, I would've accepted you no matter what," he frowned.

"I know," I breathed closing my eyes. "I didn't want to tell you because… because…"

"Because I was the one you liked?" he stated when I couldn't continue.

"Yea," I murmured opening my eyes. "But it's fine, if you don't. I get it," I added taking a step away from him. Kenma held onto me tightly and took a step forward in my direction.

"Why are you making assumptions that I don't feel the same way?" he asked.

"Well when I confessed you kind of shook your head and passed out," I chuckled gingerly.

"That was unrelated. I shook my head because I was trying to get rid of the dizziness and I faint because I was dehydrated. It had nothing to do with you confessing. To be honest, I thought you confessing was just a hallucination of mines until Kuro explained everything to me," he clarified. "You had nothing to do with it," he emphasized.

"Why would you hallucinate me confessing to you?" I asked. Kenma scoffed and shook his head gently.

"Take a wild guess," he mocked. "It's because I like you too; I always have. And I've honestly known that you've liked me, up until you came back. When Kuro would constantly bring you up, I kind of put things together that you liked me and he was trying to help you out. But you were gone and I didn't know how to contact you, so I just kept everything buried inside of me. When I first saw you again during a volleyball tournament, you seemed so different. I was too anxious to approach you and you never attempted to approach us. When you came back, I was relieved and happy, but you were distant. You literally called me Kozume," I chuckled and nodded. "You acted like those years of childhood didn't matter, that the years in between were too big for us to continue acting like friends. Why do you think I wanted to share a bed with you so badly? Why do you think that every morning you found me turned over on my other side clinging to you? Those weren't accidents! I—"

"I get it, Kenma," I whispered tenderly. "I'm really happy, but we still can't be together," I sighed.

"What? Why?" he frowned squeezing my hands.

"Because we're in high school. We still have our whole lives ahead of us. We still have people to meet and things to try. Who knows how long these feelings we have for each other will last? I don't want to destroy our friendship under the guise that a romantic relationship is more important—" Suddenly Kenma punched me in the chest his fist laying over my heart.

"Since when did you become a skeptic of love?" he frowned lowering his hand and grabbing mines again. "Keiji, I have loved you, literally from the first day I can remember. I am an anxiety riddled no-life who's only able to make friends through my only other preexisting friend. I will never, _ever_ find someone else to love besides you. I know that relationships are complex and messy, but we're not—we're simple. I will never get tired of you, not even on the day I die. And if you never get tired of me, than what's stopping us?"

"Kenma—"

"Keiji, I love you. And I don't mean I have romantic feelings for you. I honestly, love you with all my being. You're the only one I need. I know we're not dating and I know people say that it takes a while to know whether you actually love someone, but I had seventeen years to realize that I loved you. If you honestly don't love me, it's fine. I can handle us just being friends. But if you do love me, and are willing to stop lying to yourself, then hurry up and be my fucken boyfriend, because goddamn it, love is worth anything," he smiled.

"I've honestly never heard you talk this much," I hummed with a smile. "Kenma, I love you. Will you go out with me?" I asked bring his hands up to my lips. Kenma smiled triumphantly as he nodded his head.

"Of course, you idiot," he smirked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for reading this! I'm so sorry if the ending seems rushed or abrupt. I was going to continue writing more about each couple and them actually being together, but due to medical problems I decided to end the story early. If people are still interested, I would be more than willing to continue it. There will be a mini bonus chapter upload this Thursday.


	11. Epilogue: What Comes After

"Guys, hurry up! We're going to be late!" Mother cried rushing us.

"We'll be fine," I shouted after her, the two of us running several steps behind.

"I can't take the chance of being late for my son's graduation!" she hollered. We rushed inside the school and into the auditorium. "Look its Kenma! Kenma!" she yelled waving over at the blond. Kenma turned around with a smile and put a finger to his lips. When our eyes met, he gave me a wink and turned away. Chuckling, the three of us found a good spot and sat down. "You two aren't ditching school or anything right?" she asked turning to me and Bokuto.

"Of course not!" Bokuto chimed. "I mean it's just review and personal studies. Our exams are next week," he chuckled scratching the back of his head. Mother sighed and gave me an unamused glanced. I shrugged.

"I'm smart, I'll be fine," I smirked.

"Tetsu's out of school, so he'll help me study!" Bokuto chimed happily.

"Well you're always welcome at my house," she smiled kissing his forehead lovingly. "It's nice that you two are going to the same college, not to mention getting an apartment together," she chuckled.

"Thank god we both love volleyball so much," he grinned.

"Thank god you both love each other so much," she teased. Suddenly the band started playing and mother flailed excitedly. As the ceremony went on, I thought back to all the struggles I had to go through in the past year. Coming to terms with who I am, coming out to my father, getting disowned, moving in with my mother and older brother who I hadn't spoken to in about ten years, reuniting with my childhood friend and crush, opening up to my friends, and—by some divine power—dating the boy of my dreams. Not to mention, eventually hooking up my brother with my captain and going on very terrible, yet wonderful, double dates with them.

As we all sang Hotaru no Hikari¸ Kenma looked over his shoulder at me. Smiling at him, he smiled back and looked away. When the ceremony ended—all of us filing out into the school's corridor—Kenma caught up to us with two of the other second years, the delinquent and the maneki, from the volleyball club following behind him. "I'll take you to Kuro's class," he stated. The two of held hands as we walked down the crowded hallways.

"Still can't believe you two are dating," Mother chuckled pinching Kenma's cheek. "I knew you would become my in-law son eventually, but not this soon," she sighed happily.

"Mother!"

"Oh please! I'm just having fun," she laughed. We waited outside of Tetsu-nii's classroom, the majority talking about volleyball and how much we'll miss the third years, Bokuto beginning to sob at the idea of becoming an adult. The moment Tetsu-nii stepped out, the libero beside him, Bokuto tackled him, showering him in kisses and affection.

"Get a room," Yaku shouted. Kenma gave a look of disgust and I chuckled bumping him with my shoulder. I wrapped my arm around Kenma as we still held hands and gave my brother a smile.

"Congratulations, Tetsu-nii," I hummed giving him a nodded.

"Thanks, Keiji," he smiled back, his arms wrapped around his boyfriend.


End file.
